u/BusyAfternoon1326

Context: May car loan kami ng asawa ko, siya yung primary, ako yung cobuyer. Reason kung bakit sya yung primary is because when we applied for a loan, kakalipat ko lang sa bago kong company back then, 4 months pa lang ako while sya years na so mas strong ang employment background niya.

I was the one who decided to get the car so ako nagbayad ng dp, ako rin nagbabayad ng monthly. Thing is, maghihiwalay na kami. I want to keep the car kasi mas need namin ng mga anak ko while sya magrerent na lang naman ng apartment at wfh.

I am ok with keeping the car and continuing monthly payments pero ayokong malugi na pag natapos kong bayaran, sa kanya lang mapupunta technically kasi sya yung primary. I want to secure myself sana as early as now, so would pasalo agreement and SPA save me? Para may written agreement and proof na ako yung nagbabayad and by the end of the term may panghahawakan ako na ittransfer yung ownership under my name or pwedeng ako na mag-asikaso lahat since may SPA naman? Willing naman sya pero I want documented proofs.

Any advice po? Thank you!

Problem/Goal: Gusto ko nang hiwalayan asawa ko. Happened before pero nung nanuyo sya tinanggap ko pa rin sya (I know it’s stupid). Multiple cheating— pinatawad ko (sobrang tanga right?).

Context: After ilang years, microcheating naman. May years na ako yung mas gumagastos sa bahay, hindi nya rin ako tinulungan sa business namin noon but gets credit for it hanggang sa napagod na lang ako, di ako mapagtanggol sa family niya when Im being disrespected, and lately, found out na he’s been lying to me for almost a month about something na pinag-awayan namin. Di niya daw alam pano ico-communicate pero ang akin, why is it easier to lie to me than to tell the truth?

Additional context— 10+ years together, may kids. Minsan naiisip ko na lang mag-abroad but I don’t want to leave my kids.

Additional context ulit: 1st ko sya, 10 years bago niya ako pinakasalan (may anak na kami nun). Tanga ko diba? Ewan ko rin, nagsisisi talaga ako bakit pa ako nagpakasal, ni hindi nga sya nagpropose, parang naisip na lang namin parang for formality na lang at sa bata since may anak na rin naman at matagal nang magkasama. Dami kong bad decisions talaga sa kanya. Dapat di ko na sya tinanggap ulit. I posted sa isang reddit sub noon na nagsisisi akong pinakasalan ko asawa ko, I prayed, and then nagkaayos nanaman pero ngayon, pagod na ako, parang inuuto na lang niya ako kasi alam nya after mag-die down ng argument namin, malalambing nanaman nya ako tapos back to normal nanaman.

Previous attempts: Marami na, maraming beses ko na sinasabing maghiwalay kami pero ayaw niya pero di na talaga healthy for us. Mas ok na di na kami magkasama para wala nang away because I can’t trust him anymore.

This time parang ok sa kanya, nakahanap na daw sya ng lilipatan pero saving pa for rent deposit and advance kaya daw di pa sya makaalis. Told him na makitira muna sa family or friends niya while saving up (next sweldo nya yata) because my fear is, papalamigin nya lang yung sitwasyon tapos magsosorry ulit at me, as weak emotionally, magpapatawad nanaman.

Help me guys, palakasin niyo loob ko with my decision to get my life back again— free from lies and manipulation. Be brutal to me, basta kahit ano palakasin niyo lang loob ko. 😭 Not telling my friends and family yet dahil may iba magaadvice nanaman na ayusin, pag-usapan, pero ayoko na, pagod na ako! I just want to tell them pag hiwalay na kami at he’s out of this house.

If ako nagbabayad ng monthly at cobuyer ako, sa account ko din naka-auto deduct yung MA, mapprocess ba ng bank na ako na yung primary at yung primary maging secondary?