u/Brief-Ship-5572

I desperately need the money by this week

Thanks

Thanks

Whats are some dead giveaways that someones from Derby.

What are the obvious signs that someone grew up here/is a local?

From the posture, manner of walking to volume of voice...what are they?

I am talking about everyday basic shit.

Salam alikum,

I am a reserved woman, I have never had a relationship with a man and feel awkward/uncomfortable around non mahrams and opposite gender.

I dont chase men but some men have usually showed interest in me first in person. Then, if I am interested, I start to like them back.. they are attractive (personality and physically at the time).

(I did once make the first move for a guy online and let's just say I won't be doing that again.)

But...usually, after some time I realise they didnt even like me they way I thought. They mainly like the way I make them or their ego feels.

I usually am in the background or maybe used as a placeholder or ignored while they live their lives. I am usually unappreciated until I suddenly disappear. Even when I disappear, some have gotten furious because "how dare I?". (Guy i chased first did that).

A couple of them dated and Marry the very next girl because she's wifey material (Guy I pursued did that).

Plus, the men seem emotionally intelligent, empathetic and mature at first or maybe its all in my head and I think they're amazing and green flags or romanticise them.

The reason I'm angry though is the other day I found out the guy that I was most recently interested in is absolutely nothing like I thought he was.

He follows new women on social media daily and unfortunately, I think he's too lustful. The women he follows are pretty, slim, big chests and thousands of followers. The type who dress/dance a certain way and they get loads of comments and likes from various men globally.

In real life, he kept his distance from me out of respect, gave me space and he duchenne smiled at me and kept eye contact. I assume its because he was pleasantly surprised when he first saw me. He was also quiet and respectful to not just me, but also some of my family because they were with me (he helped us in regards to Umrah).

Or....maybe he didn't even like me at all and its all in my head hence he follows new women everyday.

I must admit, I only found this out because I did a bit of snooping and his social media following list was public. Whereas, we only have eachoher on WhatsApp and on there, he posts statuses with deep quotes and I found out hes a poetry lover...this made me fall for him too..the fact that as a man, he likes deep and thoughtful poetry/quotes. I honestly thought he was emotionally intelligent.

I do feel bad thought because he has no idea that I know. It's just so confusing because the tiktok him is nothing like the WhatsApp him that I know.

Another pattern I have found that I like a man's personality but later down the line, find out he's taken.

The third pattern i have found is that single men don't choose me, they find someone better. I am a quiet boring person with high walls. I am sensitive so maybe they're being nice simply cos of my demeanour.

Thanks for reading.

Just a little rant.

Edit- I think the other strange thing about me is that im so loyal. I won't even look at or think about another man if I like one man and then in the background, hes following new women.

Hey,

I dont chase men but some men have usually showed interest in me first. Then, if I am interested, I start to like them back.. they are attractive (personality and physically at the time).

(I did once make the first move for a guy and let's just say I won't be doing that again.)

But...usually, after some time I realise they didnt even like me they way I thought. They mainly like the way I make them or their ego feels.

I usually am in the background or maybe used as a placeholder or ignored while they live their lives. I am usually unappreciated until I suddenly disappear. Even when I disappear, some have gotten furious because "how dare I?". (Guy i chased first did that).

A couple of them dated and Marry the very next girl because she's wifey material or whatever I'm not so sure.

Plus, the men seem emotionally intelligent and mature at first or maybe its all in my head and I think they're amazing and green flags or romanticise them.

The reason I'm angry though is the other day I found out the guy that I was most recently interested in is absolutely nothing like I thought he was.

He follows new women on social media daily and unfortunately, I think he's too lustful. The women he follows are pretty, slim, big chests and thousands of followers. The type who dress/dance a certain way and they get loads of comments and likes from various men globally.

In real life, he kept his distance from me out of respect, gave me space and he duchenne smiled at me and kept eye contact. I assume its because he was pleasantly surprised when he first saw me. He was also quiet and respectful to not just me, but also some of my family because they were with me.

Or....maybe he didn't even like me at all and its all in my head hence he follows new women everyday.

I must admit, I only found this out because I did a bit of snooping and his social media following list was public. Whereas, we only have eachoher on WhatsApp and on there, he posts statuses with deep quotes and I found out hes a poetry lover...this made me fall for him too..the fact that as a man, he likes deep and thoughtful poetry/quotes. I honestly thought he was emotionally intelligent.

I do feel bad thought because he has no idea that I know. It's just so confusing because the tiktok him is nothing like the WhatsApp him that I know.

So, I guess I am looking for books where a man doesn't recognise a woman is there or her worth until she leaves or something very similar to my story/I can relate to.

A book where he's a player type/emotionally immature/avoidant. He has a roster or follows loads of women on social media.

She is avoidant too a little?

Bonus if they are not already in a romantic relationship.

Thanks.

Books about a guy who doesn't realise a woman's worth until she leaves. Recs please.

She likes him but he doesn't appreciate her. She thinks better from him than he actually is.

He's a player type/emotionally immature/avoidant. He has a roster and follows loads of women on social media.

She is avoidant too a little.

Bonus if they are not already in a romantic relationship.

I’m looking for a deeply emotional fiction novel about a young woman who grew up surrounded by toxic, abusive, or disappointing men and therefore struggles to trust masculinity, relationships, and the idea of marriage. Because of her trauma and loneliness, she finds herself emotionally drawn to more gentle, emotionally intelligent people, and becomes confused about whether her feelings come from genuine attraction, fear, safety, attachment, or unmet emotional needs.

The story can explore trauma, femininity, longing for emotional safety, complicated sexuality, loneliness, identity, healing, and the desire to be loved and protected without being controlled. I want something psychologically deep, raw, comforting, and realistic — not judgmental, overly political, or purely romance-focused. More character study and emotional healing than smut or clichés.”

I am looking for a thriller where the MC is trapped because of helicopter/sheltering/controlling parents and they're watching other people progress in life and move on such as get married, have children, career progression or moving out.

Mainly where the MC is stuck or mentally trapped because of the caregivers. Mc is stuck in childhood house and watching everyone else go forward except MC. Mc even watches their siblings go forward in life.

If non fiction, it can be a self help book.

Thanks

A story about a woman who is not thriving and is getting worse day by day?

A poc who has grown up living or is currently living a sheltered life.

Thank you

Her social anxiety and social phobia prevents her from even having social media accounts of herself.

Her social anxiety even prevents her from doing easy daily tasks such as driving or errands.

She had bad social skills. Awkward energy. She shrinks herself and is hyper aware.

She hides and hates being seen/heard/perceived etc.

She strongly feels like everyone is judging her and she is a people pleaser, too agreeable and conflict avoidant.

No one really knows her apart from "She's so quiet".

No cocky/daft answers please.

How?