u/BigBrayMan

Hello,

I am not sure if I’m posting in the right area but really need some help understanding my brain and why it does what it does. I’ve been with my girlfriend for less than a year and for unknown reasons I can’t stop thinking about the idea of her cheating or going to cheat. I have no evidence of it, there’s no reason for me to think this.

When we first started talking it was right after she broke up with her ex which I believe is a part of it, and she has a few friends who have seemed to be into her in the past that still reply to her Instagram stories here and there but she has never broken my trust and always tells me she loves me. She is amazing and shows it in every way and I am so grateful for her but I want to get over this thought in my head. It is like this voice in my head that tells me she is calling another person, texting other people, thinking about her ex. I am like 99% sure she isn’t but this voice.. this alter ego won’t stop talking. It makes me anxious, it makes me feel a tightness in my chest, I feel like I need to snoop on social media to try and find evidence.

Some context: I have never been technically cheated on. In my first year of college I was on-off with one girl for 2 years and she moved away to NorCal for college. We said ‘I love you’ before this yet when she left she began to get cold, wouldn’t text me for hours at a time, said she was “hanging out” with others in the dorms, and would be out late hours in the night without a word. One night was especially bad and I had this terrible feeling in my chest that felt like a void was there, I was hurting from my emotions that she may be out with someone.. and I was right. She was with a boy and after that we stopped talking. It hurt so much. Other than that I was in a 3 year relationship before my current and it was normal, I did not overthink much.

I know this is not healthy, but am I in need of therapy? Does this need a professional fix or are there remedies maybe anyone here knows that I can try and practice? My gf knows I am scared of getting cheated on but not the full effect it has on my life. Also, I do my very best to not let this fault in my own thinking affect our amazing relationship. Thank you for any advice, I am sick of feeling this way.

Hello,

I am not sure if I’m posting in the right area but really need some help understanding my brain and why it does what it does. I’ve been with my girlfriend for less than a year and for unknown reasons I can’t stop thinking about the idea of her cheating or going to cheat. I have no evidence of it, there’s no reason for me to think this.

When we first started talking it was right after she broke up with her ex which I believe is a part of it, and she has a few friends who have seemed to be into her in the past that still reply to her Instagram stories here and there but she has never broken my trust and always tells me she loves me. She is amazing and shows it in every way and I am so grateful for her but I want to get over this thought in my head. It is like this voice in my head that tells me she is calling another person, texting other people, thinking about her ex. I am like 99% sure she isn’t but this voice.. this alter ego won’t stop talking. It makes me anxious, it makes me feel a tightness in my chest, I feel like I need to snoop on social media to try and find evidence.

Some context: I have never been technically cheated on. In my first year of college I was on-off with one girl for 2 years and she moved away to NorCal for college. We said ‘I love you’ before this yet when she left she began to get cold, wouldn’t text me for hours at a time, said she was “hanging out” with others in the dorms, and would be out late hours in the night without a word. One night was especially bad and I had this terrible feeling in my chest that felt like a void was there, I was hurting from my emotions that she may be out with someone.. and I was right. She was with a boy and after that we stopped talking. It hurt so much. Other than that I was in a 3 year relationship before my current and it was normal, I did not overthink much.

I know this is not healthy, but am I in need of therapy? Does this need a professional fix or are there remedies maybe anyone here knows that I can try and practice? My gf knows I am scared of getting cheated on but not the full effect it has on my life. Also, I do my very best to not let this fault in my own thinking affect our amazing relationship. Thank you for any advice, I am sick of feeling this way.