Hollow
Been working a lot. I haven’t had a vacation in years. My job is at a low income store. Lately, the customers are getting more and more aggressive and hostile. In this week alone I’ve been called every name under the sun. Have had things thrown at me. And just the other day I had to file a report as a witness because a creepy guy assaulted a female customer and I had to intervene.
These situations & interactions are taking everything out of me.
My mum died in October and I couldn’t even take time off for the funeral because I couldn’t afford it.
It’s Mother’s Day tomorrow and even though we had been estranged, I’m still sad she didn’t get to be happy and live her life as best she could.
I’ve been asking my partner about a break and I’ve been nagging more and more about it lately and he got mad at me. I know we’re poor…car died and had to buy a different car, paying off expenses from my mums death, vet bills, ect
I get it but at the same time I feel like…dying every day. And at the same time I feel all the weight, I also feel hollow. I feel less and less like a person, less like me every day. I don’t know what to do anymore.