u/BanjoMann736

I’m hoping somebody can help me. I’m 18 in my first year of university and have been applying to jobs for two years. By that I don’t mean that i send out an application every once in a while, I mean I am constantly applying to countless jobs a week. I have tried everything, tailoring my resume to fit better, applying in person, making cover letters, applying online, applying on indeed, applying on the company site directly, calling to ask if places are looking to hire, calling to follow up on applications. I don’t understand what I am doing wrong. I have a lot of volunteer hours with references to verify and i speak 3 languages. My english is perfect i’ve lived in Canada for 15 years. I don’t know what the issue is. I swear i’ve applied to every grocery store and retail place in my city. I’ve even applied to places i’m not qualified to work at in hopes i’ll get lucky. I have a pretty ethnic name and on my resume I wrote that i speak arabic fluently so I’m thinking of removing that and changing my first name to something more generic and basic because maybe they think I don’t speak english or something?? I got one interview at a tutoring centre which would’ve been a good fit for me as I did well in high school and am doing well in university. They gave me TWO whole interviews, asked for my references and then completely ghosted me. I wish they’d just rejected me so I could move on but I guess that’s asking too much. I’m about to give up on this. I’m just gonna start going by a common white name and pray I get hired since something clearly has to change. If anyone has any advice I’d appreciate it.

Sorry for long ass post i’m just venting mostly. The last paragraph is the current conflict so you can just skip to that if you’d like. I’ve recently been butting heads with one of my sisters. I am the youngest of 4 kids, me (18F), sister 1 (20F), sister 2 (26F) and brother (28M). We moved to the country we live in now when I was just 3 years old so me and my sisters are more integrated while my brothers tends to be more on the traditional side since he was older but that doesn’t really matter.

Sister 1 and I have always been pretty close since we have a small age gap and have shared a room most of our lives. I feel like this is a normal dynamic to have with her and not with sister 2 since sister 1 and I went to the same schools a lot of the time and share similar personality/ humour. We also both played soccer together so we were naturally closer. Since we also shared a room we were used to changing while the other was in the room so we’re pretty comfortable and i’d say we’re way closer with each other than with the rest of our siblings. There’s been a couple times where sister 2 has walked in without knocking while I’m changing and i yell at her to get out and rush to cover up and she plays it off like oh it’s ok we’re sisters and just invites herself into my room. I’m not comfortable with her watching me change i think it’s super weird.

Sister 2 and my brother have a small age gap so they are closer to each other than I am with them which doesn’t bother me at all. I have a bit in common with my brother since we watch soccer together and he likes video games and I do too but I don’t have anything in common with sister 2 and frankly find it hard to hang out with her.

She can be quite negative which is the last thing I need in my life. She finds a problem with like anything and is very over the top. When me or sister 2 have a friend over, she pretends to be friends with our friends by calling them by a nickname (ex. calling my friend Jessica, Jess even though no one calls her that). She also makes it a point to comments on random things that don’t matter and interrupt us. I just hate this and end up leaving common areas and going to my room after telling her to stop.
Me and sister 1s room shares a wall with her room and once we were talking it up and she burst into our room and we stopped chatting and looked at her and she was like what r u talking about and we were like …nothing? and she got all upset saying she heard us talking and just wanted to join. It killed the conversation and i just ended up going downstairs and watching TV.

So far it seems like I don’t hang out with her, I used to though. I’d be in the car with her playing some of my favourite music and she’d criticize it. I’m super into Mac Miller and one of his songs came on and I was talking about how much I loved that song and how I loved his music and messaging. She got all nitpicky and started saying his music sucks cuz all he does is swear a ton and then everyone obsesses over it. There are some songs where he swears a lot but I wouldn’t say it’s excessive. Even then, his music is still good. She just always feels like she needs to be different and always needs to be right.

She also acts like she knows sooo much and she can never be wrong. I hate it when people can’t admit they’re wrong when corrected. You could hold a PHD in the matter and she still wouldn’t accept being corrected on the matter. It’s so infuriating since sometimes it’s about the dumbest topic and shes willing to die on whatever hill she’s on.

I think part of the reason I’m not super close with her is because she’s been acting like my mother my entire life trying to tell me what I can and can’t do. I was getting ready to go out with my friends the other day and she tried to tell me I’m not allowed because i’ve been going out too much. I just stared at her and walked out the house cuz she’s not the boss of me lol.

One other thing I feel I need to mention is her incurable tendency to overshare. Oversharing about yourself is fine whatever I don’t care but oh my god when she started oversharing about things I told her I was so angry. I don’t tell people stuff so hearing that her random ass friends that i’ve never met know stuff that even some of my friends don’t have details on it made me so angry. I have an autoimmune disease and she told all her friends and she makes sure to mention it to new friends aswell. Why tf would your grown ass friends who have never met me need to know your little sister has a chronic condition???

I’m on break from university and i’ve taken the past week to just chill at home and do nothing while I mentally prepare to start the summer semester. I also have chronic fatigue so I’ve taken this week to just let myself be tired for once. She came up to me when I was unwinding on the couch by colouring on my iPad (very therapeutic) and asked me why I was “being like this” lately and I was confused. I took my headphones off and asked for clarification. She said i’m always in my room or napping and not hanging out with my family. I got pretty mad and was like are you new here?? I’m always tired that’s why i’m always either asleep or doing non strenuous activities, i’m trying to relax before classes start again. She asked me if this was just how I was gonna live my life and why others with my condition are able to live productive lives. I reminded of how much I was doing everyday especially in high school and how I push through it when necessary but I just wanna be lazy for a bit. I got mad at the comment about other people with my condition because it’s quite rare and how would she know how other people with my condition live? Chronic fatigue is not a given for everyone with my condition but I lost the lottery on that. At this point I left and went to room. This reminded me why i don’t hang out in common areas and just chill in my room all the time.

This is a more recent conflict that I just lost: there’s a get together of people from our community at the end of the month and I don’t want to go. I don’t know anyone there and I don’t wanna waste time and money going to something I won’t enjoy. I also don’t know if i’ll be tired that day and need to be home and nap. This is why I usually make plans on the fly instead of really far in advance because I can never be sure. She yelled at me when I said I don’t wanna go and asked why i’d rather sit at home and be miserable than go. I’d rather be miserable at home than with a group of strangers tbh. She snitched on me to our parents who are out of the country and said I don’t talk to them, spend all day in my room and am always tired. My mom called me three times today to ask me what’s going on with me and why I hate my siblings. I feel like i’m in a black mirror episode cuz everyone is against me on this one even sister 2 says im being lame. My mom says I have to go and it’s not a discussion. I’m just gonna go to the dumb gathering and leave the group to do my own thing. Maybe i’ll sneak off and go see my friend who lives in that city lol.
I dislike sister 2 and would not be around her if she wasn’t my sister. I feel so evil for this but she’s just so pessimistic and odd I hate it.

EDIT: Just found out my brother has also been the one snitching to my parents. Pushing thirty and mad that your 18 year old sister won’t hang out with you so you run to mommy and daddy is crazyyyy. I don’t understand why these geniuses don’t talk to me if they have an issue with me and pretend everything is fine around the house. F it we ball ig.