u/Ave29C

Me and the autisic person that I clicked with. For some odd reason. When I am near him now, I can feel a buzz of energy on my skin. Depending if he’s making eye contact with me. Where he looks, it can go to my chest or to my face. Has anyone else felt that with their friend, partner or safe person that you click with. I’m trying to understand this. I’m autism and adhd. I know I’m under stress due to my sister health issues. But these sensations is a whole new territory for me.

Hello,

So I am a women in my early 30s and I’m barely discovering that I’m autism and maybe adhd. And the reason I say it because in my current job. I have an autisic guy who used to be in the marine corps who always wanted to talk to me. But because of his autism. He’s shy and goes quiet half the time. He’s able to communicate to all the other staff. But not me. I’m short, curvy and have a youthful face. He’s a single dad to two kids. An autisic teenage son. And a college age daughter. So it’s been 1.5 years of him orbiting me, listening to my conversations, and staring at me. If I don’t walk a certain way, like a hallway he will panic. The second year into the job. I found out that he went back to his ex gf. This ex gf was someone whom he dated for a year. And when I arrived a year and a half ago. He took a break. And met me. Idk what is it about me that he finds fascinating but can’t talk to me. I have seen his autism quirks up close and personal. So as time goes on, he lost his one true safe person of 10 years. His secretary. I attended the funeral out of respect for him
And the family. The girlfriend didn’t show which was odd. The following day. My dad’s dog was put down. I had to be at home to process and grieve. When I returned he began following me and hovering me. Looking back, I think he sensed my grief and sadness. That’s when we begun doing Parrel play a lot during my breaks. Which I was happy but didn’t understand since he was seeing his ex gf. So time goes on. We begun saying hello or good morning. The new year came, I decided to give him an evil eye charm. As a thank you. He received it well and paced back and forth like crazy. Around March of this year. I can’t explained what happened. We clicked. It was towards the time of spring break. I work at a high school. He let me stare at his face. He didn’t look at me Ofcourse, but I didn’t feel Afraid, I felt peace, hope and love. And idk why. I wanted to go he his hand and kiss him. Spring break came and went. And I was noticing he was around me more. Even closer to my personal space. Three weeks before prom. A second click happened. I finishing my final shift for the day. And he found me. He was looking at his phone and he initiated eye contact. He looked into my eyes and I did to. And I felt this nervous surge of energy all over my body. It wasn’t calm. And I’m normally grounded saged. Idk if I felt his desires and attraction. Idk. It was intense. Then came prom. I came to chaperone late. So I was mingling and minding my business. I saw him. And Ofcourse he looked cute and handsome. But I think he was looking for me. So I was talking to some colleuge outside( my outfit was a form fitting dress, I am unfortunately curvy so everything showed more). I even straightened my hair and all. So my colleuge asked me if I wanted to go inside to grab dessert. So me and her went. And as I was grabbing dessert. He found me. And I kid you not. He looked stunned and hid behind a wall. I went back outside. He eventually found me outside. And was standing around my area very quiet and awkward. And then he was walking around and was behind a kid. And he saw me, I saw him. I smiled. And he hid behind a kid. So at some point in time he offered me a chair. Idk how he knew my right knee was bothering. So I sat. I was outside for a while. He kept coming out to stand by me and then inside for the kids. I eventually went inside to be with my friend. And I took off my sweater and obviously my skin and dressed showed. So I went to go talk to my friend for most of the night. And I was having a good time. He came around and was standing next to me. But he couldn’t look at me. But at the ground. He out of nowhere asked if the advertisement was a wedding one. And me and friend said no. It’s a quince one. Idk where that thought came from. I just said the venue that we were at is to expensive. So he eventually left. Towards the end of the night. He knew I was getting ready to leave. So he walked ahead of me. Idk where he was going. Me and my friend hugged and said bye. So I was walking to my car and I guess I didn’t realize that he parked his car close to mine. I told him have a good night. He responded with thanks for coming and drive safe. I said I know. And I got into my car and he was watching me drive away.

So why am I saying this. We clicked twice before prom. He was stimming when he saw me at prom. From my understanding of autism safe people. Cause I know I’m his safe person. It’s more easy and flow of conversation. I feel like we’re something else. Something more. If anyone can give their opinion or thoughts.that would be great.