u/ApprehensiveVideo932

I’ll be in Manhattan and Brooklyn for a week, and I’m looking for pilates studios that work heavily with dancers. If anyone knows which studios NYC ballerinas frequent, that’s the type of training I’m hoping to try out while I’m there!! ideally group classes, but I’m open to scheduling a private with a master teacher (i teach pilates full time, so I’m looking for the kind of teacher who deepens my own practice and understanding if im booking a privats).

let me know what recs you have!

33F, married to a generally great 38M. Recently though, my husband revealed to me he had 15k in credit card debt he didn't know about (he's not lying - he's an anxious avoidant type and forgot about the cards due to years of avoidance). I'm not in debt, and I inherited a fair amount of money a few years ago and used some of it to pay off my husband's student loans. He feels guilty that I've given him tens of thousands of dollars, and he refuses to accept any more money from me to pay off his card.

Since this reveal though, I've been quietly quite upset with my husband for allowing his avoidant tendencies to allow for interest to spin out of control. My husband is seeing a psychiatrist now about that (as per my suggestion). I'm also frustrated that I feel like I do everything (I clean, I work more, I manage the money, I manage more of the emotional labor, ect.).

I love my husband dearly and we're getting through this with a plan, but I'm feeling like I want to do something selfish for once since I feel like nobody in my life takes care of me the way I take care of them. I love love love love love to dance, and was thinking about taking myself on a solo trip to New York City and taking as many dance classes as I possibly could for 48 hours and then come home. I can afford the trip financially, but I'm afraid it would hurt my husband if I told him I want to do this for myself and he's not invited. I also am absolutely terrible at doing things by myself, and I'm afraid I'll never commit to this trip because I see it as so frivolous and selfish.

Advice please, on whether I should do the trip at all, and if it is the right thing to do, how do I overcome feeling selfish about it?

eta: to answer some questions, my husband was able to ignore the debt because minimum auto payments continued and he hates checking his accounts (another thing I’m now managing for him and another reason I’m feeling selfish). He truly didn’t lie. He works in an industry that required some technical upgrades, he put it on the card, and then avoided looking at it for years. yes he’s been very irresponsible with his money (thus why I’m now micromanaging his accounts and why I’m feeling drained and tired), but truly there was no major deception.