Its not BURNOUT, its DRAINOUT
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This happens when good, kind, caring, generous people are used and never poured back into.
If you have people in your life that check on you, who actually reciprocate compassion, kindness, generosity, support etc., GIVE IT BACK to them.
Stop just benefiting from people with genuinely kind hearts.
It is NOT weakness to be kind and to be generous with your time, belongings, money, emotional and physical support to others.
Even people YOU don't benefit from in any way.
Really, thats possible? Shocking.
IT IS weakness to function in mentalities without empathy, integrity, and character based in ethics. It makes life smaller, colder, emptier etc., more toxic and lacking of peace, more unsafe and you have to be constantly guarded, more unsettled, to function this way.
Why would we ever consider this the WAY to be, as a yardstick of strength?
It's not. Living like this is causing humanity to reach for suicide as a mass scale solution for pain! We are seeing school shootings increase at an exponentially level. Life as a whole, FEELS SCARY for everyone.
Do you struggle with insomnia, panic level anxiety that makes your thoughts race heavily?
You are either surrounded by people who do not make your nervous system on a WHOLE PERSON level, feel safe. OR
YOU are someone who functions with a mentality that white lies to bend or guide an outcome with strategically detailed "truth" is fine, finding the loophole to getting out of doing the right thing is fine if you feel like it or want to, to get out of hard work, or face healthy conflict, hard conversations, or GROWTH AND CHANGE that would make YOU a better human.
If you think functioning in 'I need to only look out for me' is going to help your mental health, its not.
Selfishness causes people to mentally decomposs across their lives.. self focused minds are MISERABLE.
They are ALWAYS complaining, never grateful, find something wrong with everything and everyone (There is a difference between trauma based tunnels from hypervigilence and survival, and truly selfish people for the record).
BE BETTER PEOPLE!!
If you think our world has gotten to ALMOST WW III because WE MADE THE RIGHT CHOICES INTERPERSONALLY, we are ALL wrong.
Set your phones down. Shut your TVs off. Step outside and smile at someone. Talk to someone. ASK curiosity based questions to get to know each other again. We still all have favorite colors and exotic animals that we always wanted to own as kids.
Come on people. Really.
We ARE ALL struggling.
We are all worried about how life is going to go for the future. So, WE GET TO DECIDE.
What do WE want our relationships to look and feel like? What types of people do we want to be?
Do you care about the lasting impression and impact on another, as you cross their paths in your life? YOU SHOULD.
If you don't, your someone that likely leaves trails of hurt everywhere you go and dont even realize it cause your so wrapped up in YOUR OWN LIFE.
We NEED to reconnect with LIFE. LIVING, BREATHING, LIFE.
Stop killing ants just cause they are tiny and annoying. We walk in THEIR home.
Stop thinking its funny when others have something embarrassing happen to them.
Stop internally feeling smug when you find out someone you don't like, goes through something tragic. Grow up and check yourselves.
This is toxic, and makes YOU not healthy. It is not healthy to be happy when others are HURTING. Like what!?
Why is this something we even have to remind ourselves as a SOCIETY on a MASS SCALE?
\-I'm talking to all you women out their that live vicariously through your kids-
(TSA BOOSTER MOMS, BAND MOMS, PTA MOMS, DEEPLY INVOLVED CHURCH MOMS.....WOMEN who need to focus on their own misery and figure out what they need to change in their lives TO BE AUTHENTICALLY HAPPY, instead of living as bullies throughout your lives and raising faculty and socially loved females, who treat other girls like SHIT behind their polished smile and groomed etiquette (the worst humans know how to present perfectly because they were raised in the right class and social circle) because they saw you gossip, trash talk and act like a 16 year old children with your ladies on the back patio sipping sweet tea).
And yes, i am ALSO talking to the men who abandon their women and leave them alone in the hardship, stress and exhaustion of carrying life, instead of loving them, supporting them, nurturing them in a way that they ACTUALLY feel cared for, wanted, valued, prioritized.
You are the reason, married and unloved women, dont show up for their kids or are too emotionally exhausted to be kind and generous socially.
Some women bloom and pour into the world and leave beauty, healing, light everywhere they go. Other do not.
The difference? Some men love their women feircly and because of that, their women have love to pour everywhere they go. Others starve their womans soul and betray their promise to protect, cherish and care for them. Their lights are suffocated, by being starved the love and safety promised to them.
So, to be a HIGH VALUE woman, loved and respected everywhere, it requires a man that shows up for HER in a way that makes her life protected, warm and feeling like home, NOT a homeless shelter where you have to sleep with an eye open for her own protection FROM EVERYONE, including you.
If your woman is a grumpy nag that you bitch about. You created that by abandoning her in every way that actually felt like love and security.
Fuck you all, truly. 90% of you truly are like this and its disgusting.
Then have side chick who support the patriarchy by actively believing the piece of shit men, who destroyed their womans soul and spark in the first place, and then turn around and say their life is so hard and their woman is so aweful and treat rhem so terrible.
SHE PROBABLY DOES.
WOULDN'T YOU if you BEGGED a man FOR YEARS, sometimes decades for some women, who promised to protect, care for, VALUE them and did the opposite in every way?
And likely GASLIT repeatedly and made to feel bad everything she had hurt or a need being left unmet. Repeated rejection and abandonment from people who say they love us, actually causes trauma.
It likely made her mental health errode from DRAINOUT and never receiving needs that requires selflessness from the man who CHOSE her. Any man who chooses a long term committed relationship.
You ARE CHOOSING to nurture the woman with romance, affection, compassion, generosity, selflessness, protection from insults and harm that could come from outside people. YOU choose to accept that this is YOUR ROLE as her romantic partner.
So if you dont get sex. This is why. You.
Why would she want you to touch her? You actively refuse to love her. Literally.
You actively refuse to keep your promise to her, betray her by talking shit about her with your guys or people in general, leaving her chronically paranoid about your loyalty to her.
And then when you even smile at another attractive woman, we PANIC and feel insecure. Hello?! OBVIOUSLY. How can she trust your loyalty? You trash talk her to other people?
You actively get annoyed at her for wanting your time and attention. Or for wanting to know you see her as special. That requires ACTUAL EFFORT on your part. Thinking about your person, from a place of "how can I make this person's life better cause I love them." And then taking action to SHOW them that they ARE that special to you.
WE HAVE TO SEE IT IN ACTION AND EXPERIENCE IT IN REAL LIFE, IF YOU EXPECT US TO BELIEVE YOU THAT YOU ARE ACTUALLY GOING TO BE LOYAL AND TRUSTWORTHY.
God forbid you actually act happy to spent time with us?
God forbid you might have to put effort into THINKING about a date night THAT YOU WILL HAVE FUN DOING TOO. Like what the fuck....seriously. God forbid she might actually need some affection, that feels loving and not like a bid to gets YOUR DICK WET.
There is a reason woman stop cuddling, wanting to be touched in any affectionate way. You made it a strategy to take care of your horney urges. Its never about actually connecting in a loving and safe way.
What is wrong with the male species existing today.
This is for woman who DONT FEEL BAD about dating married men:
BRING BACK WOMAN BELIEVING WOMAN. Stop believing the piece of shits that flash their smiles, money, conditional affection that brings you instant gratification (it comes at the cost of other peoples LITERAL lives).
WOMEN WHO ARE LOVED AND CARED FOR CORRECTLY- POUR LOVE INTO EVERYONE AND EVERYTHING THEY TOUCH.
IT IS A NATURAL FUNCTION- TO NURTURE- AS A WOMAN WHO IS HAPPY.
So if you know any who are not, they have DEEP needs being unmet.
WOMEN USED TO NOTICE AND SHOW UP FOR EACH OTHER. NOW, their is almost relief that their life is worse than anothers. Why? Why are we like this and think its perfectly normal? Its not.
People"
When did we start thinking that functioning in actual HATE and NONSHALLANT emotional experience is fine?
We all need to be better fucking people.