I'm a woman in my late teens, attracted to men, no question about that. But I'm confused about whether I might also be attracted to women
When I was around 13–14 I had a moment where I felt genuinely drawn to a woman in a way I'd never felt before, It scared me bc I had a lot of internalized homophobia at the time so I immediately shut it down and avoided her, I don't have any other memories of feeling that way before
I also had a very close female friend, for a while I sometimes imagined us being in a romantic relationship but it felt weird, not bc the idea was bad but bc I'd been taught that thinking that way was wrong so I stopped imagining it and now I don't feel romantic feelings toward her. I still love her as a friend but nothing more
I also had a phase a couple of months ago where I was fantasizing about women sexually. It lasted for a while then it stopped, I don't know if that means something or if it was just curiosity
Now I'm questioning if I were actually attracted to women, wouldn't I have felt it more consistently? Or is it possible to have one isolated moment like that and still be attracted to women?
I'm also exhausted by men in general (patriarchy, insecurity, ego, bad sex and etc...), and I sometimes think women are better in many ways. But when I imagine myself in a romantic relationship with a woman I don't feel the same way I do with men. So I'm worried I'm pressuring myself or confusing frustration with men for attraction to women
Has anyone else experienced isolated moments of same‑sex attraction like this and then nothing for years? How did you figure it out?