My wlw problem
I got into a relationship with my masc girlfriend 3 months ago, and she’s my first wlw relationship. We were genuinely good together and loved each other a lot. She’s a very sensitive person, and I always tried my best to be considerate of that.
About two weeks ago, she and her sister got into a car accident. I immediately went to the hospital when it happened, but she didn’t let me stay long and told me to go home. She got injured and stayed home for a week afterward. During that whole week, I tried not to overwhelm her because my way of showing love when someone is sick is by giving them space and not burdening them with too much talking or attention. I kept checking on her, asking about her pain, listening to her vent, and a few days later I visited her at home with food, a homemade immunity drink, and a gift to cheer her up.
But something had been bothering me the whole time: she told me her ex got to the hospital before I did because her sister’s phone automatically alerted the ex. I didn’t bring it up at the time because she was in pain.
Around that period, she also kept telling me that there was a distance between us lately, that I’d started going out more without telling her )it happened only maybe a couple times), that we barely talked anymore, and that when she tried to tell me something hurt her, I would somehow turn it back on her. I told her I genuinely didn’t think I was blaming her, but maybe I had some built-up feelings because the ex situation really hurt me.
So I asked her:
“Did you send me home from the hospital because you didn’t want me to run into your ex?”
That question changed her completely. She exploded at me and got extremely angry. She told me that doubting her honesty is a huge trigger for her and that she’s always been truthful with me. I tried explaining that I wasn’t accusing her of anything, I was literally just asking because I needed reassurance.
The next day we talked more calmly, and she said:
“thats it, I need space.”
I begged her not to pull away and asked if we could work through it together, but she kept saying:
“There’s nothing you can fix. I just need time.”
Now it’s day four of complete silence. I’ve been crying nonstop and genuinely feel destroyed. I can’t understand how someone who loved me so much could suddenly distance themselves like this after our first real conflict.
I know I shouldn’t break no contact again because I already begged her to stay and she still chose distance. But I can’t stop wondering:
Did I really deserve this reaction over one question?
Was I actually that wrong?
Or is the punishment way bigger than the mistake?