u/Affectionate-Ant3047

Basically, what I'm talking about is how nowadays, in many male friendgroups, but in many settings in general, people have to bring up gay men this gay men that. I mean, I get some aspects of annoyance, but some guys go a bit overboard and talk about it nonstop. Like we agreed "making it your whole" personality thing was weird, and its still weird either side.

They'll be fine with lesbians and not gays. Which, alright, but the point is why even feel the need to bring that up repeatedly? Or they'll go in depth about the dynamics of gay or lesbian sex and compare. I don't want to hear it, tbh.
Alright that you like one over the other, everyone is entitled to their own opinion. When it gets weird is talking about exposing little boys to hooters or talking about force-assaulting a gay son. It is just extremely creepy and weird, and doesn't seem any different from those predatory gay men who talk about converting straight men.

Maybe I'm the odd one out, but a lot of guys' constant sexual talk - whether they are gay or straight about anything, is genuinely gross. Why can't we have a normal conversation as friends, without some dude bringing up some random negativity? Jokes are fine, but serious bullshit talk irritates me.

Its beyond fetishization, or "they'll treat me how I treat a woman" or any other excuse. I don't want to hear all these bullshit pseudoscience studies or theories or whatever to justify anything, I genuinely do not care? Why obsess over male sexuality that much to the point of lunacy that you are going in depth about it? If most men aren't gay/bi, then move on and stop caring about some tiny nonexistant minority?

The length some guys go to is insane. They'll talk about it nonstop and obsessively. They'll cite x and x low sample study or with bad methods (with little verifying), yet when someone cites a study threatening their worldview they'll full on rage. I just...don't get it, why even go that far?

Title

Sick of that "pathetic bf/husband" archetype lately

For some context, Im talking about that new archetype where there's usually a strong or intelligent young woman, paired up with an absolute dumbass who "sits through" her completely valid feelings and/or is a man who shows emotion, but the way he acts is extremely performative, and finally has no gall of his own to standup. Not sure how to pinpoint this, but vision was sort of like this with wanda in wandavision, but this is especially bad with Austin in Austin and Ashley from Beef, and also George in season 1. Also present in San Clarita diet with Joel and Sheila.

Not sure what this is, but I absolutely despise the male characters and can't help but feel bad for their wives to put up with these absolute dumbasses.

Im so confused what that sub is. They repost straight porn with really big dicks, but its straight porn...but the men in the comments are fantasizing about gay sex and the titles are also gay??? Like is it self insert for bi/gay men?

And the subs supposed to be guys talking abt gay shit together while watching straight porn, because....?

Sorry if Im wrong 😭 idk what it even is

Why do some people talk as if entire genders are repulsive?

For context, Im a gay male myself, but Ive never found vagina "gross or repulsive" neither do I find anything female repulsive. To me, Im just mainly neutral.

However, for whatever reason, some (and I truly mean some, not every single one), gay men will rave constantly abt how gross vagina is, straight men will rave and thrash around about how gross penis is and how they saw it once and have a seizure talking about it, etc.

Ive seen women do it too, particularly lesbians (not all before the pitchforks come), constantly say that "all penises are repulsive" or "all men disgusting." And Ive seen people weirdly overanalyze how the male form is gross or repulsive, alright cool (ignoring how Greece and many other cultures idolized it). Why talk about it constantly then? Like...these arent things anyone can change, do people realize that?

Look. There is a difference between not being sexually attracted to something and just outright saying "wow, this must mean its universally just repulsive and disgusting." That is a natural human body part, what is wrong with some people? Alright if you dont like it, but WHY CONSTANTLY talk about it? This is the part that I do not get. Those are humans too. God forbid these people have children, are they going to tell their kids that their natural given genitals are repulsive and disgusting? Do these people know the harm in that?

Seriously, some people are crazy. Not liking it or being neutral is one thing, loudly thrashing disgust and repulsion is just weird.

How do I stop being?

How do I stop being gay? Serious question. I've known I liked dudes for a while but I want to change that.

Most men internally are grossed out by it, I see all these studies on how most men are normal, and it causes your life to be harder in several ways. Im a virgin and ive never been with a guy before, have a good relationship with my father and brothers (im the youngest), and have good grades, make my father proud as I go to a great university and study engineering.

I feel most of my male friends would probably automatically think Im less than, and I dont want to deal with the pedo or creep allegation stuff most guys say or think, or how most guys talk about it a lot and how its unnatural etc, so I do believe it is. I dont want to risk my reputation or feel comfortable identifying with that lifestyle.

Most men won't really be okay with it, and will be with two women, and that's okay. I get that they probably have normal brains too.

A bit of a word salad but bear with me.

Growing up, I've always perceived women to be more trustworthy than men. This is because as a kid I was quite shy or had a higher pitched voice so a lot of boys my age avoided me. What I *did* not know, was that the women or girls around me were largely performatively kind. A large part (even if not all women obviously) of women's kindness is socially engineered or performative/fake: for example, teachers "hugging" you until you realize thats just what they do or giving you therapy talk. Girls siding with you one moment then immediately ditching you.

Women, from my experience, tend to cluster mainly around two types of men (although theres others). When they have male queer friends they usually only really let them around them or be close if theyre extra feminine and willing to suck up to them, or around men that are extra masculine in role and their boyfriends.

In High School, I came out as bisexual to two friends who I thought I trusted. Instead, they (both girls) would write explicit "yaoi" about me. I threatened to report them; and then they accused me of assaulting them during their gym class (which they never even shared with me, and led to them getting caught in their lis), and got their (and my) entire extended friend group to simultaneously pile upon me. Now, the claims were found to be false, and eventual consequence was given, but that permanently caused a large part of my trust towards woman to shatter. Why? Because as a result, I was basically hounded with rumors about my sexuality by them, as they claimed I was gay, etc. even if action was taken, this is what people thought of me. I was in a homophobic conservative town, so my only real hope was continuing my education and exceeding in my classes. I did, and was admitted to a great university. Ever since then, however, Ive realized how superficial many women can be (not all).

For example, I tried to make friends with some girls, but now that I present more masculine or "straight" looking to them, they perceive it differently. I find myself having a much easier and better time making friends with guys, because I believe if I make friends with women theyll either judge me for being gay if I disclose too much or even perceive a certain way, or if I wont be able to express something without it being constantly judged. With guys, I feel like I can keep it chill and talk about a wide variety of subjects and even express my emotions way more.

Anyone else feel this? Initially trusted women way more, but then realize how nasty many women can be? Ive never really had issues to this extent with guys honestly. At most one negative moment that some dude gets over quickly.