getting tired of constant “constructive criticism” from my girlfriend
My girlfriend is very complimentary toward me, but almost every compliment comes with a “but” attached to it. Like “Dinner was really good, but next time maybe use less sauce” or “You looked really nice today but I think your other jacket fits better.”
I’ve brought it up before because after a while it starts feeling less like encouragement and more like I’m constantly being graded. She told me she’s not trying to tear me down and that she’s just naturally constructive with people she cares about. I actually believe her, which is why I feel conflicted.
But ever since we moved in together it’s been happening constantly, and it’s honestly exhausting. I’m starting to feel like nothing I do can just be enough on its own without some adjustment attached to it. The weird thing is our relationship is genuinely great otherwise.
I really want a future with her, which is why this bothers me so much. Is this the kind of thing couples can actually work through, or does this eventually become a deal breaker for people?