0 Days of No Contact, Absolute Silence, and Pure Rage—I’m Done With the Hacks.
I’m 40 days into No Contact with zero movement, and honestly, I’m at my breaking point. I’m spiraling, and I’m not going to sugarcoat it—life is absolute shit right now. Between the weight of some heavy life stuff I'm dealing with and the mental exhaustion of waiting, I’ve officially stopped doing affirmations. I quit them about 10 days ago because I just don’t have the energy to lie to myself anymore.
Here is where I’m at:
- The Void: I feel completely drained and drowned. I’ve tried every manifesting "hack" in the book, and I’m still standing here in a situation where I feel zero peace while waiting for a sign.
- The Conflict: I am furious. I hate him for leaving me in this mess after promising he never would. I want him to come back, but mostly, I want the apology I deserve for him being a total coward.
- The Intuitive Connection: My best friend has this weird gift where everything she says—good or bad—eventually happens. She doesn’t even know I’m consciously manifesting him, but she has told me repeatedly and with 101% certainty that he will come back. It’s the only thing I’m hanging onto when my own belief fails.
Note to the sub: Do NOT tell me to "move on" or give me generic advice about "self-love" or "focusing on yourself". I’ve already handled my academic responsibilities and I am moving toward my career goals. I don't want to hear the same recycled scripts. I am filled with a void and I am tired. I just need to know if anyone else has hit this level of "surrender" through pure, unadulterated rage.