u/AccordingRevenue2790

hi,

i made a post yesterday, saying that i wanted to do a comeback in my life. i feel like i have a lot inside my chest and i need to pour everything out. i want to do a disclaimer : im searching for help and advices, im not saying i am having it harder than anyone, i know i have my flaws and all, im just trying to know where did it all go wrong. also, english is not my first language sorry.

i'm the typical type of insecure person. i've been fat my whole life, my parents, family and friends/strangers always laughed at me bc of that or said harsh things like : you are ugly, you need to change, you'll be loved more if you were skinny blahblah. i'm also some kind of a dreamer, kinda geek but i wanted to be loved by people. before high school, i've created a strong independant non-insecure persona, always saying "i don't care!!!", maybe that's what saved me during the bullying phase.

my family always bullied me, they were really tocix with me and unfair. i don't have solid examples i can share bc it's still kinda private but the "light" things they did to me was humiliating me during dinner bc i was eating, or giving away all of my toys/clothes/games because my mother taught i didn't cared and she wanted to make my cousins happy (i was 8), my mother would choose her parents and brothers over me, i've been hit, my father decided that i was the one responsible of his depression and i became his therapist (i was SEVEN), my cousins bullying me and my parents told me i was the problem. this kinda sum up my childhood. my high school story is short : ive been bullying in secret, floater friend who was mocked bc i was diag with depression, nobody believed me blahblah

since then i've been struggling with heavy depression and massive eating disorders, i have hyperphagia. you can say, oh it's nothing you can improve. well, when i was 18, i thought too. i moved out in another country to change my life.

my parents were never truly proud of me : i am not skinny, i don't have a lot of friends, i am not an extrovert, i am not "like them", i don't like to go party a lot, i don"t talk a loooooot like them. they always hated that, even tho they're trying to find some reason to like me. even if they love me, they don't like me, becayse i always tried to go against theur controlling and manipulative side. i do love them too, even tho i wished they were kinder to me when i was a kid/teen, cuz i feel bad now, they always says i isolate myself with them. i can't really help it, cuz i feel so burdened with them. i lost 2 years after i graduated bc they forced me to go to a med school; when i changed, they never stopped telling me i made a mistake and "people changed my will"... no mom, i just don't like it...

in a spawn of 2 years ; i met a group of friends on the internet. i had a twitter account, i was in a fandom, i was happy i could find a group of friends in a new country. they "loved me", and then one day, i became the scapegoat. they stopped talking to me, made up false stories about me, started a smear campaign, cyber bullied me, dropped my family/personnal issues on the internet and laughed about it, laughed about my face, my reputation was absolutely destroyed !! so many ex friends dropped me and started to mock and bully me too. i tried to stay silent but it was too much cuz they said i deserved to die. one day, i told one of my friend what happened, she then went on the internet too and defended me with her whole chest. i felt better byt also people mocked me and insulted me bc "how dare you expose us like this ? DIE !!". they made sure i can't make friends anymore, they made sure my former friends unfollow me. their reason ? i was too "egotistical". you know, i can understand if someone do not like another person bc of this trait, but ngl, i never knew i made them feel like this cuz it happened so suddenly and... i don't think i deserve to be bullied bc of that no...?

also, i don't know if it's relevant to the story or if it explain my depression, but i never had a love interest. i am not asexual, i just never let myself love someone, or i never tried to get close to someone. ive always said i wasn't interested. hum, tbh no one really was interested to me either. i was the funny fat girl, all of my classmate were rich 10/10 girls so i never tried. even now, i still runaway from any love attention. maybe it did affected me idk, i was sooooo sad that i really thought i wasn't meant to be loved, so i stopped letting myself crush on someone when i was 13, it was for the better :')

anyway, after that, everything went downhill : got isolated, lost my self worth, self confidence, depression got so bad, lost my spark, i'm afraid to make friends, afraid to show myself, hate my body and my face, i stopped making myself pretty, stopped bying things for me, overthink everything, hyperphagia is woooorst, and the saddeest thing, my dreams disappeared. i lost my will for life. i'm still kinda fat, i lost 20kg in 8 years but it was due to depression and EDS...

the bullying is not the only thing. well, i was bullied my whole life but i thought maybe one day things will get better. i was borned really really poor, in a poor country, i tried to move out and change my fate but i was welcomed with bullying, xenophobia, racism... i saw and lived things in my new country really sad. i always have minor problems too, health problem sometimes, my dad is really ill (even tho i don't like him, i still feel i need to be there for him), my mom is keeping me locked in her arms, i can't even dream about living in another country or make my dreams come true.

last year, i had a new goal, but SURPRISE, i found out one of my bully was working in the same industry. after that, i decided to stalk them and i was really sad. they're all happy, thriving, living their dreams, and from what i heard, they're still making fun of me and making up lies to my acquaintances...

what a life lmao. i'm not proud of myself, i am scared. yes scared, a COWARD. i decided that my chances were over, decided that i couldn't be happier, i am scared to see them, scared to go against my toxic family, scared to show myself, scared to change things. i'm trying to be kind, respectful and generous, and i'll still be, but how can i make up for those lost years, how can i finally be happy with myself, how can i be confident and stop crying from sadness and loneliness. thanks, god, i have some good friends and i love them.

i know i made mistakes too, nothing really bad. i could've been more mature when i arrived at 17 yo, i know i should've stand up on myself too and stop hiding. i know there's a part of my life when i was really centered on myself cuz i had no one to lean on. i've worked on it, i went to therapy and reflected a lot. i am self aware, i know who i am, that's why i am coming here to ask for more help and real advices to become a best person

i am 22 today, i want to become a good version of myself, built my life, make my dreams comes true, make my family FINALLY proud of me, stop being insecure, stop being depressed, smile again, go outside, trust people again, stop caring about people opinions, stop caring about #their opinions, stop caring about the rumors, focus on MY life, take the beest revenge ever.

thank you !

hi,

i made a post yesterday, saying that i wanted to do a comeback in my life. i feel like i have a lot inside my chest and i need to pour everything out. i want to do a disclaimer : im searching for help and advices, im not saying i am having it harder than anyone, i know i have my flaws and all, im just trying to know where did it all go wrong. also, english is not my first language sorry.

i'm the typical type of insecure person. i've been fat my whole life, my parents, family and friends/strangers always laughed at me bc of that or said harsh things like : you are ugly, you need to change, you'll be loved more if you were skinny blahblah. i'm also some kind of a dreamer, kinda geek but i wanted to be loved by people. before high school, i've created a strong independant non-insecure persona, always saying "i don't care!!!", maybe that's what saved me during the bullying phase.

my family always bullied me, they were really tocix with me and unfair. i don't have solid examples i can share bc it's still kinda private but the "light" things they did to me was humiliating me during dinner bc i was eating, or giving away all of my toys/clothes/games because my mother taught i didn't cared and she wanted to make my cousins happy (i was 8), my mother would choose her parents and brothers over me, i've been hit, my father decided that i was the one responsible of his depression and i became his therapist (i was SEVEN), my cousins bullying me and my parents told me i was the problem. this kinda sum up my childhood. my high school story is short : ive been bullying in secret, floater friend who was mocked bc i was diag with depression, nobody believed me blahblah

since then i've been struggling with heavy depression and massive eating disorders, i have hyperphagia. you can say, oh it's nothing you can improve. well, when i was 18, i thought too. i moved out in another country to change my life.

my parents were never truly proud of me : i am not skinny, i don't have a lot of friends, i am not an extrovert, i am not "like them", i don't like to go party a lot, i don"t talk a loooooot like them. they always hated that, even tho they're trying to find some reason to like me. even if they love me, they don't like me, becayse i always tried to go against theur controlling and manipulative side. i do love them too, even tho i wished they were kinder to me when i was a kid/teen, cuz i feel bad now, they always says i isolate myself with them. i can't really help it, cuz i feel so burdened with them. i lost 2 years after i graduated bc they forced me to go to a med school; when i changed, they never stopped telling me i made a mistake and "people changed my will"... no mom, i just don't like it...

in a spawn of 2 years ; i met a group of friends on the internet. i had a twitter account, i was in a fandom, i was happy i could find a group of friends in a new country. they "loved me", and then one day, i became the scapegoat. they stopped talking to me, made up false stories about me, started a smear campaign, cyber bullied me, dropped my family/personnal issues on the internet and laughed about it, laughed about my face, my reputation was absolutely destroyed !! so many ex friends dropped me and started to mock and bully me too. i tried to stay silent but it was too much cuz they said i deserved to die. one day, i told one of my friend what happened, she then went on the internet too and defended me with her whole chest. i felt better byt also people mocked me and insulted me bc "how dare you expose us like this ? DIE !!". they made sure i can't make friends anymore, they made sure my former friends unfollow me. their reason ? i was too "egotistical". you know, i can understand if someone do not like another person bc of this trait, but ngl, i never knew i made them feel like this cuz it happened so suddenly and... i don't think i deserve to be bullied bc of that no...?

also, i don't know if it's relevant to the story or if it explain my depression, but i never had a love interest. i am not asexual, i just never let myself love someone, or i never tried to get close to someone. ive always said i wasn't interested. hum, tbh no one really was interested to me either. i was the funny fat girl, all of my classmate were rich 10/10 girls so i never tried. even now, i still runaway from any love attention. maybe it did affected me idk, i was sooooo sad that i really thought i wasn't meant to be loved, so i stopped letting myself crush on someone when i was 13, it was for the better :')

anyway, after that, everything went downhill : got isolated, lost my self worth, self confidence, depression got so bad, lost my spark, i'm afraid to make friends, afraid to show myself, hate my body and my face, i stopped making myself pretty, stopped bying things for me, overthink everything, hyperphagia is woooorst, and the saddeest thing, my dreams disappeared. i lost my will for life. i'm still kinda fat, i lost 20kg in 8 years but it was due to depression and EDS...

the bullying is not the only thing. well, i was bullied my whole life but i thought maybe one day things will get better. i was borned really really poor, in a poor country, i tried to move out and change my fate but i was welcomed with bullying, xenophobia, racism... i saw and lived things in my new country really sad. i always have minor problems too, health problem sometimes, my dad is really ill (even tho i don't like him, i still feel i need to be there for him), my mom is keeping me locked in her arms, i can't even dream about living in another country or make my dreams come true.

last year, i had a new goal, but SURPRISE, i found out one of my bully was working in the same industry. after that, i decided to stalk them and i was really sad. they're all happy, thriving, living their dreams, and from what i heard, they're still making fun of me and making up lies to my acquaintances...

what a life lmao. i'm not proud of myself, i am scared. yes scared, a COWARD. i decided that my chances were over, decided that i couldn't be happier, i am scared to see them, scared to go against my toxic family, scared to show myself, scared to change things. i'm trying to be kind, respectful and generous, and i'll still be, but how can i make up for those lost years, how can i finally be happy with myself, how can i be confident and stop crying from sadness and loneliness. thanks, god, i have some good friends and i love them.

i know i made mistakes too, nothing really bad. i could've been more mature when i arrived at 17 yo, i know i should've stand up on myself too and stop hiding. i know there's a part of my life when i was really centered on myself cuz i had no one to lean on. i've worked on it, i went to therapy and reflected a lot. i am self aware, i know who i am, that's why i am coming here to ask for more help and real advices to become a best person

i am 22 today, i want to become a good version of myself, built my life, make my dreams comes true, make my family FINALLY proud of me, stop being insecure, stop being depressed, smile again, go outside, trust people again, stop caring about people opinions, stop caring about #their opinions, stop caring about the rumors, focus on MY life, take the beest revenge ever.

thank you !

hi,

i made a post yesterday, saying that i wanted to do a comeback in my life. i feel like i have a lot inside my chest and i need to pour everything out. i want to do a disclaimer : im searching for help and advices, im not saying i am having it harder than anyone, i know i have my flaws and all, im just trying to know where did it all go wrong. also, english is not my first language sorry.

i'm the typical type of insecure person. i've been fat my whole life, my parents, family and friends/strangers always laughed at me bc of that or said harsh things like : you are ugly, you need to change, you'll be loved more if you were skinny blahblah. i'm also some kind of a dreamer, kinda geek but i wanted to be loved by people. before high school, i've created a strong independant non-insecure persona, always saying "i don't care!!!", maybe that's what saved me during the bullying phase.

my family always bullied me, they were really tocix with me and unfair. i don't have solid examples i can share bc it's still kinda private but the "light" things they did to me was humiliating me during dinner bc i was eating, or giving away all of my toys/clothes/games because my mother taught i didn't cared and she wanted to make my cousins happy (i was 8), my mother would choose her parents and brothers over me, i've been hit, my father decided that i was the one responsible of his depression and i became his therapist (i was SEVEN), my cousins bullying me and my parents told me i was the problem. this kinda sum up my childhood. my high school story is short : ive been bullying in secret, floater friend who was mocked bc i was diag with depression, nobody believed me blahblah

since then i've been struggling with heavy depression and massive eating disorders, i have hyperphagia. you can say, oh it's nothing you can improve. well, when i was 18, i thought too. i moved out in another country to change my life. still kinda fat, i lost 20kg in 8 years due to depression tho...

my parents were never truly proud of me : i am not skinny, i don't have a lot of friends, i am not an extrovert, i am not "like them", i don't like to go party a lot, i don"t talk a loooooot like them. they always hated that, even tho they're trying to find some reason to like me. even if they love me, they don't like me, becayse i always tried to go against theur controlling and manipulative side. i do love them too, even tho i wished they were kinder to me when i was a kid/teen, cuz i feel bad now, they always says i isolate myself with them. i can't really help it, cuz i feel so burdened with them. i lost 2 years after i graduated bc they forced me to go to a med school; when i changed, they never stopped telling me i made a mistake and "people changed my will"... no mom, i just don't like it...

in a spawn of 2 years ; i met a group of friends on the internet. i had a twitter account, i was in a fandom, i was happy i could find a group of friends in a new country. they "loved me", and then one day, i became the scapegoat. they stopped talking to me, made up false stories about me, started a smear campaign, cyber bullied me, dropped my family/personnal issues on the internet and laughed about it, laughed about my face, my reputation was absolutely destroyed !! so many ex friends dropped me and started to mock and bully me too. i tried to stay silent but it was too much cuz they said i deserved to die. one day, i told one of my friend what happened, she then went on the internet too and defended me with her whole chest. i felt better byt also people mocked me and insulted me bc "how dare you expose us like this ? DIE !!". they made sure i can't make friends anymore, they made sure my former friends unfollow me. their reason ? i was too "egotistical". you know, i can understand if someone do not like another person bc of this trait, but ngl, i never knew i made them feel like this cuz it happened so suddenly and... i don't think i deserve to be bullied bc of that no...?

also, i don't know if it's relevant to the story or if it explain my depression, but i never had a love interest. i am not asexual, i just never let myself love someone, or i never tried to get close to someone. ive always said i wasn't interested. hum, tbh no one really was interested to me either. i was the funny fat girl, all of my classmate were rich 10/10 girls so i never tried. even now, i still runaway from any love attention. maybe it did affected me idk, i was sooooo sad that i really thought i wasn't meant to be loved, so i stopped letting myself crush on someone when i was 13, it was for the better :')

anyway, after that, everything went downhill : got isolated, lost my self worth, self confidence, depression got so bad, lost my spark, i'm afraid to make friends, afraid to show myself, hate my body and my face, i stopped making myself pretty, stopped bying things for me, overthink everything, hyperphagia is woooorst, and the saddeest thing, my dreams disappeared. i lost my will for life.

the bullying is not the only thing. well, i was bullied my whole life but i thought maybe one day things will get better. i was borned really really poor, in a poor country, i tried to move out and change my fate but i was welcomed with bullying, xenophobia, racism... i saw and lived things in my new country really sad. i always have minor problems too, health problem sometimes, my dad is really ill (even tho i don't like him, i still feel i need to be there for him), my mom is keeping me locked in her arms, i can't even dream about living in another country or make my dreams come true.

last year, i had a new goal, but SURPRISE, i found out one of my bully was working in the same industry. after that, i decided to stalk them and i was really sad. they're all happy, thriving, living their dreams, and from what i heard, they're still making fun of me and making up lies to my acquaintances...

what a life lmao. i'm not proud of myself, i am scared. yes scared, a COWARD. i decided that my chances were over, decided that i couldn't be happier, i am scared to see them, scared to go against my toxic family, scared to show myself, scared to change things. i'm trying to be kind, respectful and generous, and i'll still be, but how can i make up for those lost years, how can i finally be happy with myself, how can i be confident and stop crying from sadness and loneliness. thanks, god, i have some good friends and i love them.

i know i made mistakes too, nothing really bad. i could've been more mature when i arrived at 17 yo, i know i should've stand up on myself too and stop hiding. i know there's a part of my life when i was really centered on myself cuz i had no one to lean on. i've worked on it, i went to therapy and reflected a lot. i am self aware, i know who i am, that's why i am coming here to ask for more help and real advices to become a best person

i am 22 today, i want to become a good version of myself, built my life, make my dreams comes true, make my family FINALLY proud of me, stop being insecure, stop being depressed, smile again, go outside, trust people again, stop caring about people opinions, stop caring about #their opinions, stop caring about the rumors, focus on MY life, take the beest revenge ever.

thank you !

hi

im trying to losing weight and I kinda had a mental breakdown yesterday.

for the people who lost a lot of weight or became confident, did yall saw a difference on how people treats you now ? are they kinder ? are they friendly now ? if I lose weight, do you think I’ll be finally appreciated and respected ?

i know this is a hard question, but someone really killed my whole confidence a few years ago with one sentence, and since then I don’t know if I hate myself as a person or is it my body, I don’t know anything.

thank you

hi, I’ll be quick:

ive been heavily depressed, heavily cyberbuilled + irl bullied by my former friends. they killed my reputation and made up so many lies about me, i was left alone. its been 3 years now since then. they’re becoming succesfull.

im not that happy cuz im still hurt and had a lot of traumas bc of this situation.

I WANT to make a comeback in my life, i want to stop hiding myself from them, i want to become a good version of myself.

the problem is that i am too self aware about myself, i am afraid of people’s opinions, im afraid one day ill go through the same thing again, I don’t want to. i am afraid they’ll comeback at me and try to ruin everything AGAIN. i am not confident now, i know i sounds like a whining kid, but it actually really affected me, they even wanted me gone from this world…

how can i stop being afraid of everything, how can i become more confident, happier, how can i be happy and free myself from them? how can I take a revenge without hurting them.

i need wise words, i need advices, i need some reality check, i need help:( i really want to change and im trying everyday… im trying to be kind and good to people while keeping some self respect, but i want to be respected and THAT person yk… I don’t want them to define my life and who I’ll be…

Hi!

I grew up in Tunisia, but I was never the super sociable and extroverted person. I am really shy, I smile when someone introduces themselves to me but I CAN’T do a proper conversation.

I am not antisocial or grumpy, I am kinda bubbly and smiley, just extremely shy and I open after a few conversations. In tunisia, it’s kinda hard to make friends if you are not extroverted like me. My family always says that I am not good enough cuz I don’t speak loudly or I don’t network like “a real Tunisian” should do…

How can I be less shy? How can I attract people and stop having so much trouble to speak to someone.