For me, I do not have any personal abuses but from my early childhood onwards, I saw my dad beating my mom. I saw her in different stages of grief. Extremely sad to Extremely angry to Accepting it as fate. Today it was beacuse, she was late to give coffee to him. She was making a snack for the fam and he came in drenched from the rain. He asked for coffee and she first gave the snack. Then she was preparing the coffee. But he got mad as hell, began to nitpick everything and thus began the verbal abuse. Honestly today was not that bad, it hopefully didn't end at him beating her. But this was the norm instances every year for my life.
I am scared of how will treat my future wife, will i be like my father. I am really really scared. I don't know I have some unexpected bouts of anger sometimes and I am just scared that I will prolly end up like him. How does a child who sees his or her mother being abused end up ? I am a 22 year old. Yeah I know pathetic right ? One time I tried to stop and it escalated pretty badly that my mom got two times the beating than usual.
But one fact I have to say is that, he cares genuinely about the family. Like he is a self sacrificing type. He loves her too and she loves him too. This type of things happen only occasionally. But when it happens, my mental state is not that good. I am just depressed. Should I see a psychiatrist ?