How can the internal monologue in your head feel when social anxiety goes away?
When walking out in public, which is what I struggle with the most and makes me want to stay home, I spend my entire time trying to take deep breaths, avoid eye contact, and push away thoughts I have about people around me or negative feelings about myself (shame). Despite CBT, I really, really struggle with the idea of being considered by a stranger. Like a visibility wound that never stops bleeding.
Sometimes rarely, if I have to focus on a really important thought at that moment or if I’m late trying to get somewhere my mind is able to shift towards focusing on that solely and the usual noise suddenly goes away…
… Is that how it can feel all the time if you get rid of this social anxiety-related thought process? Like still in your head but thinking about a random topic? Or about nothing and your head is somehow empty? Or your eyes see a tree and think about something related to that?
I know there are over 8 billion unique brains on earth all thinking at the same time right now and that means over 8 billion internal narratives but… Anyone kind of see what I’m trying to ask? 🥲