okay.. so...
i feel really, really guilty for being a darkshipper. i think its due to me getting groomed constantly. if you dont know what a darkshipper is, it means that you ship bad stuff like minor x adult. i kind of use this as a coping mechanism but at the same time i feel really bad. i feel like i am fetishizing my own trauma and i really want to know on how to get rid of these thoughts and how to stop being one.
so uhh... in April 2024, i was playing roblox and i saw this little commotion in a corner of a wall, there were many players so i approached it and read back the chat. it turns out that someone was grooming a kid and the kid cant chat because of the girl.
i managed to add friend the kid and server hop with him and his groomer, snd he told me hjs discord. i tried talking him out of it that what the girl was doing to him was bad, and i think he listened to me
we didn't talk for a few months, not until somewhere in the 'ber months where he dmed me saying that he left all the bad people in his life. i felt very proud of him and he asked me if i can join his little friengroup gc. i said yes, and i didnt talk that much bc i ddint know the people there.
then, something happened. turns out he was getting groomed AGAIN by one of his friends and it turns out that the groomer groomed him into cutting himself. i felt very bad, and the whole friendgroup was sliming the groomer and the gc just died. i feel really bad for him snd i still have him added on Roblox, but he deleted his discord :< i hope he's doing better
i downloaded a video game my friend reccomended me to play together, and as i waited for it to download and just watched a youtube video my laptop suddenly froze and as i waited for it to reset i turned it on and there was this weird dark green flash when i first opened it for the first few times. i held the power button and just clicked the keyboard without any thought before something popped up on the screen. it was this 'no boot device' thing and i clicked yes because i didnt really know what to do. it took me to this gray screen thing with a bunch of words and i tried resetting the default setup but it just wont go back to how it was.
for additional detail my laptop had ants crawling around it at the time