u/30RITUALS

Al jaren houd ik een behoorlijk strakke backup bij voor alles rondom wachtwoorden, foto's, backup emails, etc etc. Dit doe ik door een combinatie van 1Password (encrypted, betaald), Dropbox (encrypted, betaald), Proton (encrypted, betaald), en cold storage (beveiligd, offline).

Ik realiseerde mij echter laatst dat als er iets zou gebeuren met mijn telefoon ik alsnog best de sjaak ben omdat enorm veel (zakelijke) platforms een 2FA hebben dat loopt via mijn tel en huidige 06 nummer. Dus ik wil dat graag ook 'beveiligen'. Daarnaast probeer ik ook om altijd een fysieke pinpas mee te nemen, maar dat vergeet ik regelmatig want ik gebruik voor vrijwel alles apple pay.

Hoe hebben jullie dit geregeld? Stel je bent morgen je mobiel kwijt, wat dan?

Alle tips zijn welkom!

How I feel lately

My relationship with money (me on the left)

How I've felt for a long time already

me

me on the left, peers on the right

I've started drawing with my non dominant hand on post-its to see what would come up. I think it's pretty interesting, maybe even confronting. Not sure how to interpret it all, but I'll dive into this stuff more.

What do you think the more jungian interpretation of these drawings would be? the idea is that your non dominant hand can sort of channel your shadow side/subconscious

I’m in my mid 30s and one of the hardest things for me to come to terms with is how much my social life has slowly dissolved over the years.

I still have a couple of very close friends that I’ve known for 10–20 years, so it’s not like I’m completely alone. But outside of that, life has gradually become incredibly isolated. And it has become so especially after moving around a bit, going through a toxic relationship a few years ago, and ending up in living circumstances that made it hard to build continuity, living in a tiny town in the middle of bumfuck nowhere.

What confuses me is that I genuinely don’t understand what I realistically could have done differently. I do of course know that I need to move at some point to a bigger city again, which I will after family circumstances have stabilized a bit.

I’m not socially awkward - at all. I’ve always been told I’m easy to talk to, funny, warm, pleasant to be around, etc. I’ve never struggled to make friends or connect with people. If anything, I’ve probably always invested too much into friendships. I tend to care deeply, remember things about people, check in, put in effort, be loyal, and genuinely want to build meaningful long-term connections.

But over the decades, so many people have just… faded away.

Not through any dramatic conflicts. Not betrayal. Not because of some obvious personality flaw that I can point to. Usually it was just:

• someone moved
• life circumstances changed
• relationships/families happened
• jobs changed
• routines disappeared
• contact slowly died

And occasionally I’d realize I had somehow faded out of someone else’s life too, almost passively. I keep journals, and reading entries from my 20s is honestly painful sometimes because I can see how much effort I was putting into people and life in general. It reminds me of jobs I gave 200% to emotionally, only to eventually get laid off due to “restructuring” or circumstances outside my control. A lot of my social life has weirdly felt the same way.

I think what hurts most is realizing how fragile adult friendships actually are. Society kind of tells you that if you’re a decent person and put effort into people, meaningful friendships will naturally remain in your life. But that really hasn’t been my experience. The people I know my age who still have a great social life are usually either 1) still living in the big city they grew up in or 2) extremely extroverted by nature.

Sometimes it feels like adulthood is just a long process of watching people drift into separate universes from each other. And the older I get, the more I wonder: how much of friendship is actually compatibility and care… and how much of it is simply proximity, timing, and shared life structure?

Because honestly, looking back, I genuinely don’t know what else I realistically could have done. I'm not saying I'm perfect by any means. But I genuinely don't know anymore. And the few people where I deliberately cut contact, there was something that happened that I, nor any other decent human being, would simply not tolerate.

That's one thing that has changed in me, I have different standards in some ways. The older I get the more sensitive I have become to idiosyncrasies of people that I can't stand any longer. For example, people who never ask a question and always talk about themselves, people who are too flashy and boastful, people who are plain stupid, or people who can't keep their word.

But I don't think that is wrong of me at all. And it's not like many people I was associating with in the years before were like that. Again, most of the social loss has to do with any of the other reasons mentioned - but I did want to mention it. And before anyone asks, not married, and no kids at the moment. I'm not on socials either so in that sense, I'm making it harder than this might need to be. Then again, I don't want to have kids right now, or be married, and I never wanted to play the comparison game on socials.

I've tried a lot of things, but no matter what I do, marinating never seems to have the real intended effect of it properly getting into the entire flesh of chicken, fish, or meat. It always sort of stays mostly at the surface. I've tried it with tons of different marinades as well. Any tips or advice?

I see it around me constantly: couples who have been together or married for decades, yet seem quietly miserable. And the older I get, the more I question whether long-term partnership actually makes most people happier.

For many men, marriage gradually becomes a slow surrender of autonomy. What starts as love often turns into a life centered around keeping the peace: pleasing the wife, avoiding conflict, maintaining the household, and continuing to provide financially no matter what. Over time, many men seem less like respected partners and more like exhausted workhorses whose value is measured primarily by stability and income.

Their own desires, ambitions, hobbies, or even identity slowly erode. The home itself often reflects the preferences of the wife far more than the husband. Sexual attraction fades, emotional warmth declines, and what remains is routine, obligation, and social expectation. Many men stay not because they are fulfilled, but because they fear loneliness, divorce, financial destruction, or social judgment. Society labels this “commitment” or “honor,” but for many it resembles a polite prison. Yet most men want to be honorable, so they suffer, for decades. Often stuck in jobs they hate, to 'provide' for their partner who is incapable of appreciating it.

Of course, there are healthy marriages built on mutual respect, attraction, and growth but they seem far rarer than people admit.

At the same time, many women would likely be happier alone as well. A large number of men never truly mature emotionally or domestically. Many women thus end up acting as mothers, therapists, maids, and emotional regulators for husbands who contribute little beyond their income or ego. Some men are driven primarily by impulse, comfort, sexual urges, or status, while lacking any sort of self-awareness, discipline, or emotional intelligence. The woman carries most of the risk if she has children and the man leaves.

In countless relationships, the woman also carries the invisible burden of managing the household, the emotional atmosphere, and often the children too. Meanwhile, the man may see himself as a “king” while behaving more like an overgrown child demanding service and validation. Involved in his own fantasy world, he self fellates to please his own ego because the harsh reality is something he cannot actually deal with.

Then there is the pressure surrounding children. Many women are subtly or directly pushed into motherhood by culture, family, biology, or expectation, even when it may not align with what would genuinely make them fulfilled. Once children enter the equation, many feel trapped in a structure that becomes increasingly difficult to leave. For men, many are forced into a sort of emotional blackmail where they have to subjugate to the biological clock of their partner - or else their partner will leave them. Thus the man complies. In the bad case scenarios, further down the line, the children are sometimes used as sort of covert weapons of manipulation to have the man comply with whatever whim the woman came up with.

Again, there are exceptions, and there are beautiful people (both men and women) out there who are the exception to the rule.

The uncomfortable truth is that a significant percentage of couples are not together because they deeply enrich each other’s lives, but because of pure fear: fear of loneliness, financial instability or disruption, social stigma, aging alone, or starting over.

I believe that more people would live more peaceful, authentic, and fulfilling lives if they remained single or at the very least became far more selective about who they build a life with.

I have quite some friends who are into really cool adventurous sports or hobbies. Examples include; kite surfing, skydiving, motorbike riding, car racing, surfing, boxing, extreme travel etc etc. I never got into any of that, except scuba diving. I was wondering who here has a cool adventurous sport or hobby they want to share with us? What do you like about it? Looking for inspiration.

De laatste tijd lees ik steeds meer dat nederlanders overwegen om te emigreren. Nu is er natuurlijk een GROOT verschil tussen iets willen en dat daadwerkelijk ook (kunnen) doen.

Maar stel dat je inderdaad daadwerkelijk zou emigreren, waar zou je dan naartoe gaan? En waarom trekt juist die optie je aan? Voor zover ik begrijp denken de meeste NL-ers vaak aan een Zweden of Spanje.

From what I understand there has been significantly more research (including longitudinal studies) conducted with regards to the safety of MT1. That doesn't mean MT2 is less safe, but it has been researched a lot less. In addition to that, MT1 has significantly less side effects like nausea or risks of priapism for men.

I'm trying to understand why despite this, many here still opted for MT2? They seem to both be about equal in terms of potency. I would like to start my first 'cycle' using either MT1 or MT2, but I find it difficult to properly estimate the risks that are involved.