u/1_tome_

I honestly feel exhausted and don’t know if I’m doing something wrong anymore.

I have sole custody, but I still make sure video calls with his father happen regularly and try very hard not to interfere. My child is still young, 6 years old, so I stay nearby during the calls, but I don’t tell him what to say or interrupt the conversations.

Sometimes he gets distracted looking around, watching TV, or talking about random things because he’s a kid. Today his father asked if he wanted to visit, and my child quietly said “no.” This has happened multiple times on different days when I asked separately too.

After the call, I got accused of “interfering” and told to stop. I genuinely don’t know what else I’m supposed to do. I can’t force my child to say yes, and I also don’t want to pressure him into visiting when he clearly seems uncomfortable.

For parents dealing with co-parenting/video calls:
How much involvement from the parent physically present is considered normal when the child is still young? And how do you handle situations where one parent believes the other is influencing the child?

I’m 28 and I feel really burned out from everything lately.

At work, our assistant manager has been out for almost 3 months due to health issues. Because of that, my manager has been covering both his own job and the assistant manager’s responsibilities, so we’ve had relief managers come in a few times a week. One of them is honestly amazing, and I think seeing someone so calm and capable has made me feel worse about myself lately.

Recently, my manager told me I could “do the minimum job of an assistant manager,” but then also said I’m immature, get sassy, and seem irritated too easily. Part of me feels angry about the way it was said, but another part of me feels like maybe he’s not completely wrong.

I’ve been extremely stressed and overwhelmed. When people work slowly or too many things pile up at once, I get irritated faster than I want to. I don’t want to be that kind of person, though.

Outside of work, I’ve also realized I don’t really have many people to talk to, and I’ve been feeling really isolated.

On top of all that, my ex-husband still harasses me over text and email. We divorced because of domestic violence, but he still acts like I’m supposed to obey him. We have a child together, so unfortunately I still have to communicate with him.

Recently, he told me he wants our 5-year-old son to travel across the country alone to visit his family. I told him I would need more details before even considering it because our son is still very young. He got angry and sent me a very domineering email. I didn’t respond at first, but then he started calling me ungrateful and a bad mother.

I also asked my son how he felt, and he said he doesn’t want to go. He was exposed to violence too, so I think he feels uncomfortable around his father.

Yesterday I sent an email saying that our son is not comfortable going, and that I’m also not comfortable sending a 5-year-old across the country without detailed information and a solid plan.

He hasn’t replied yet, but I already know the next email will probably just blame me again.

Not really looking for perfect advice. Just wondering if anyone else has gone through something similar. I just need someone to listen to me and tell me I’m okay.