r/sglgbt

I’m 20 and thinking about moving out/running away around July/August due to personal/family reasons. Right now I have around 5k+ saved and I’m trying to figure out what amount is realistically “safe enough” before moving. (i am saying "running away" because im not allowed to move out)

This is not an impulsive decision, i’ve actually been thinking about and planning this for years. I’ve been saving money for some time and trying to plan things as realistically as possible before making any decisions.

My family environment is extremely difficult for me. They are very religious and traditional while I don’t share the same beliefs or values, and there is a lot of pressure to conform to expectations that don’t align with me. Dating is not allowed and there is strong expectation of arranged marriage in the near future. I also don’t feel like I have much freedom to live independently or make personal life choices.

Another issue is that my family is pressuring me heavily into university even though I don’t want to go right now and I’m not allowed to take a gap year. They already made me apply for university, and university is expected to start around July, which is part of why I feel pressured to figure things out soon. Staying longer in this environment is seriously affecting my mental health and making me feel trapped. I want to move out before any university-related financial commitments begin.

The place I may move into would be around $700/month rent, and I estimate my total monthly living expenses would be around 1.5k/month.

For people in Singapore who moved out young:

• how much savings did you have before moving?
• was around 6k enough?
• what unexpected costs should I prepare for?
• what should I prioritise financially before leaving?
• are there any legal issues/restrictions for moving out at 20 in Singapore or any other legal things i need to be worried about?
• can parents legally stop you from moving out if you’re already 20?
• anything you wish you knew before moving out?

I’d appreciate realistic advice from people with experience.

I know getting 377A repealed was a massive milestone, and there are definitely a lot of valid conversations to be had about keeping our spaces safe. But lately, it feels like our movement has completely fractured and we're just focused on fighting each other.

Ya I get that calling out genuinely harmful behavior is one thing, but it feels like every other day now we are just beefing over whether AMABs are truly "safe," (ngl enbys should get to exist without gendered bs), arguing in feminist circles about whether misandry can be real, or aggressively calling out "toxic" people in our own community. If I wanted to watch an endless compilation of people purity-testing each other and arguing over micro-labels, tbh church isn't that different lol can just go there.

I feel like we are losing the actual "activism" part of our movement.

377A was the bare minimum, not the bar. We still have massive systemic hurdles to cross in Singapore:

Housing inequality for queer couples

Workplace discrimination protections

Accessible trans healthcare

Marriage

Anti-discrimination laws

But now the main discourse just feels like endless internal beefs, and dare I say, quite toxic considering the actual systems discriminating against us haven't changed at all.

I get that hyper-analyzing language and policing each other's trauma is a very common internet trait atp, but honestly, bringing that energy into our local organizing is just incredibly counterproductive. This constant cycle of outrage and internal policing shouldn't be the way forward for our community. Why are we trying to cannibalize our own movement instead of dismantling the system? Overall it feels like this space is getting more and more negative and exhausting.

Am I the only one who feels this way? We really need to redirect our energy outward again. I dunno. I'm aware I may be in the minority opinion here.

With the new guidelines from MOH, reporters — sometimes from around the world — are going to ask questions about your experience as a young trans person in Singapore.

We recently received an email inquiry from what we later found out was a TERF news source. This is a reminder for the community that they should take steps to protect themselves even against journalists:

DO NOT GET SCAMMED OR TRAPPED. I urge members of the community to refrain from responding to reporters' questions without checking a reporter's credentials and priors. Always check a reporter's credentials. If they are emailing from an established news website, they should have that website in their email. Check that the website is valid, and check if that website is affiliated with TERF sources in the US, UK or another Anglophone country. (And yes, The Guardian is a TERF news source)

When speaking to a reporter, ALWAYS USE A PSEUDONYM. Do NOT use a psuedonym that is similar to your chosen name. Do NOT use a pseud that ties back to your handle on Discord or any other social media. You should insist on being anonymous unless you are confident that you and your support network are able to handle being under the spotlight.

When speaking to a reporter, do NOT offer information that is harmful or hurtful in nature. Always assume that the information you give up will hurt you, unless you trust the news outlet and the news reporter writing the piece.

Thank you!

Just wanted to make a PSA to everyone about being vigilant and aware of your surroundings :-( Long story short I was taking a dump at the CC during work hours earlier. Usually I go to a pretty secluded/unfrequented toilet because I’m a shy pooper.

While I’m inside minding my own business, I hear someone enter the toilet and go into the cubicle next to mine. Nothing wrong, but after a long while it felt a bit off because it was TOO silent. So I looked around and from the corner of my eye I spotted the person’s phone camera peeking on top of the walls of the cubicle. I’m lucky to have spotted it as he was raising it up, so I don’t think he managed to take anything significant (I hope)…

When I caught him he kept apologising but also had the audacity to ask really inappropriate things 😭😭 Dude was mad corny or something and kept asking me to be involved in whatever the hell he was doing. I got him to open up and show me his phone. In hindsight I should have taken a video/photo of him when I did that 😞 but I was too frazzled.

In the end, told the CC staff and they asked me to launch a report.

Lots of sick people around guys, always keep a look out and stay safe 🥲🥲

I personally only heard of the repeal of 377A about 3 years ago and since then I have not been informed about anything within the SG-LGBTQ rights sphere. I recently came across this recent release by MOH where they were restricting GD treatment on Twitter but couldn't find it since.. 😅

I have a few questions,

Has gender rights been backsliding more and more? Or is this a more recent, unexpected incursion?

It is to my understanding that pro-family conservatives have been advocating for restrictions on gender discourse, and if I remember correctly the head of one of the film review bureaus was a religious family conservative.

And where to get organized? I was recently at the Labor Day rally but I did not manage to speak to the LGBTQ collectives there. I do believe however that my struggles are aligned, we all stand to lose dearly if we don't organize. Are there any organizations where straight folk like myself can assist? Or at least follow up, share, stay informed etc?

Any help is much appreciated!

Hey guys, 18 yr old ftm here. I started HRT on june 4th 2025 via private clinic and now, sg laws are becoming stricter regarding HRT being provided to individuals under 21 with private care. Long story short, if you are 21 and above, you can continue HRT. If you arent, you most likely have to stop. There is a condition where if you already have been on hormones, you may proceed to continue with taking HRT as per normal WITH the help of the TRP (Treatment Panel Review). I can go into the details of it but it is TOO long and irritating for me to deal with right now as im currently freaking out about what to do with my transition. I have about a month's worth of testosterone cream with me right now and im trying to think of other ways to be able to get my hands on testosterone. If there are any resources, could you guys kindly share them with me/others who may need it? Thank you :)

Edited to clarify the date

Writing this here maybe because I’m asking for advice, but more out of frustration with life and the people I’ve dated.

Last year, I met this guy overseas. We kept in contact and eventually became really close. Later on, he got a work visa and moved to Oceania for work. We would talk a lot about his new life there, the people, the culture, and everything he was experiencing.

For him, I was probably one of the first people he got really close to. I never expected much from the start because realistically, we came from completely different worlds. Still, somewhere along the way, feelings naturally grew.

Recently, he told me he met a really great guy there. He even asked me for dating tips and advice on relationships. I gave him the advice genuinely because I wanted him to be happy, and honestly, I think he’s finally getting to enjoy a life that he probably always felt repressed from before.

And I know I should feel happy for him.

But at the same time, it hurts a lot.

It brought me back into that same depressing feeling again, wondering why this keeps happening over and over in my life. I know maybe it was one-sided from the beginning, and maybe I read too much into the closeness we had, but emotions don’t really listen to logic sometimes.

Maybe the painful part is seeing someone finally become free and happy… just not with you.

hiiii I’m a 19F butch4butch lesbian and I’m reaching out to other wlw butches! (Only in my age range, 19+!) I’ve never seen any butch4butch couples in sg and it’s already been hard to find other butches but I’m here to try my luck >:D

I hope to expand my social circle and meet new people for sports, bar hopping, sapphic events(?) and online stuff like co-op gaming~! Open to friends or more as well!

I like to draw, workout and game most of the time! My Top 3s for games are:
- RDR2
- Cyberpunk2077
- The Last of Us

I love anime as well, Death Note and Chiikawa! <3
Feel free to reach out to me, DMs are open!! :D

hi, im trans ftm and i recently started having trouble doing my own shots after 2 years… somehow. its been agitating. im 3 days late

looking up clinics gives me no definitive results for whether they can help me with this. no one i know around me is trans and has experience with intramuscular injections.

i went to a polyclinic earlier today. they mentioned that they cant help inject my thigh, but they can administer it through my arm or my butt. its not something im used to and honestly i cant convince myself that i want to try. i did tell them my butt would be fine though cause the arm would hurt more, but its just my luck that of all vials i brought it was one that had expired. so they couldnt help me anyway.

not really interested in subcutaneous either :(

I’m 19yo and I met this 53yo guy, I don’t think he is conventionally attractive but he is very fit and tall. I’m sure I can grow to like his face. We met at a gay sauna, and had some private time in a room. It seemed like he wanted to find something long term. He also said he really likes me. We went to eat afterwards, and we went back to his place. The next morning I left for home after we had breakfast. My sexual preference is fit and tall so us together seemed really exciting. However, he was really worried about us not liking the same things. He is into old chinese dramas, slow songs and catholicism while I’m into pop music. His dad jokes don’t land well most of the time but they filled the conversation when I was quiet. I enjoy his bubbly personality. But he can be quite insecure about his looks. He told me he had a belly and wanted abs because that’s what people wanted from him in this gay world, and would send me pictures of shirtless models. This happened twice in the same day. I told him that what was underneath mattered too and to stop talking about looks but I got no response to that. Our next meetup became a disaster. Some of his preferences didn’t align with mine. Such as him preferring no physical contact in public. My energy was noticeably off for some parts of the date, and he suggested I go home to rest but I insisted on going to the onsen he likes to go. So we went and he paid for it. In the onsen, he thought I would be popular with the guys and asked me to go find them. I asked whether he would be unhappy if I had fun with other guys and he said no. So I agreed and we left each other. When he saw me again having fun with some other guys we smiled at each other and I ignored him again. I went to find him shortly after, he was wearing his clothes in the locker, I asked why, he said he needed the toilet. So I left for the pool again. I got a sense he was not feeling ok so I started feeling down. After a long wait, I found out through the staff that he left the onsen. He also blocked me on all platforms. I was stoned.
When I think back to our time spent together, I realised that sometimes I really did despise his face. But other times, the more I stare, the more I can appreciate his features and fine lines. I really think everyone deserves to have happiness, and if I can give it to him and still feel ok, we should be together. I feel like the difference between the love I can give him and someone more “ideal” is not big. I feel like we didn’t explicitly discuss our future which led to a lot of misunderstandings. I know some of his schedule and his workplace, should I go find him?

I discourage opinions that end up saying I have a long way to go, or more fish in the sea.

hi everyone question ah where do yall get your clothes from that fits well? especially short mascs

preferably affordable too! normally i get stuff from uniqlo but too basic already 😭

helloo, happy Monday!!

title is rather self-explanatory, so as title suggests, I’m looking for hangouts/dates, to expand my social circle, get to know more people yk 😝😝

in particular because of my past, I’m trying to explore my sexuality too, and figuring out life at the same time (Not too certain if I’m actually bi or gay, dated girls before but never guys)

abt me: I’m a guy, he/him, turning 19 this year! currently a poly student :)

If you’re interested to hangout/go on dates, do contact me & we’ll go from there ;)

have an AWESOME AMAZING week ahead!!

Hey I am a 22 year old male, just trying to look for friends that share similar interests with me.

I am still kinda not over my ex so this is purely for friendship haha.

i am interested in movies, topics relating to Singapore and hearing news perspectives. I really pride myself on being open minded so just throw me any opinion and i am extremely willing to hear you out but i will ask questions back lol.

For additional context about me: I am in my second year of university, love watching local plays and love being spontaneous

Wow even though it was only Thursday night, there were already so many people. The place felt overwhelming. Most of the crowd seemed to be around 25–35, and since I’m super shy, I ended up not really getting anything out of it. I just used the jacuzzi and then went to the sauna by myself 🤣. I’d like to go again next time, but hopefully with someone already so it won’t feel as awkward hehe.