r/sarby

Yup. Was settling down for the evening with the cats, and in the process of getting out of bed I lost my balance and fell HARD crotch-first (specifically inner labia and clitoral area inwards) onto the metal bed frame. The pain was indescribable. Women, you can imagine. Men, imagine someone violently cutting open your penis from base to tip. And then the blood. It was everywhere. The floor, the wall, my trousers were soaked, I was covered up to my elbows in it… it was obviously not something minor. Especially once I got up the guts to grab a hand mirror and see what exactly had happened. Hospital time for sure.

To RVH (our local casualty dept.) I took about four steps into A&E from the taxi, leaving a trail of blood behind me, and dropped like a stone from (surprise!) blood loss. So far I’ve spent the evening in Majors wearing weird underwear, being asked repeatedly how I got the injury (they clearly think I am lying and that it’s something sexual rather than an actual accident) and I’ve just had an entire class of medical students come in to have a look because “we’ve never seen an injury like this before.” I have officially declared tourist season open on the good china, given how many visitors it has had in the past 2 hours.

And now I’m on an uncomfortable hospital bed still bleeding but wearing magic pants, waiting for for Gynae to return the call from A&E because none of the emergency doctors will stitch it up because of “the nature of the area.” So my clit’s swinging in the wind and I’m stuck with a 4in gash in the good china, which both attracts medical students and is immensely painful.

Urgh.

TL;DR: Fell badly, landed wrong, split the good china open and now stuck in the hospital waiting desperately for restorative action and further painkillers.

UPDATE: Just received at least eight stitches (that’s when I decided it would be best not to keep counting, knowing as I did that part of my labia was hanging off and my clit was barely clinging on by about 1/4 of its usual attachment width) under local anaesthesia… into what turned out to be a six-inch-long gash, and INCLUDING NEEDLES DIRECTLY INTO THE CLIT, to stitch the catastrophe back together and stop it bleeding. I will never be able to sit down again.

Also, I met another flock of medical students!

ETA: I moved in what was apparently an unacceptable way and PULLED ON THE STITCHES OWIWIWIWIWIE, AND NOW THE STITCHES THEY HURT SO BAD AGAIN ARRRRRRRGH I’m going to get the fucking frozen peas again

UPDATE: I have an emergency gynae appointment next week to further investigate the possibility of reconstruction. Right now? I feel like I have a million termites in there crawling and nibbling because the healing ITCHES SO BAD 😩 And the worst part is it’s only temporary healing because they’re going to reconstruct so much SO I’M GOING TO HAVE TO GO THROUGH IT ALL AGAAAAAAAAAIN😭😭😭

ETA 2: ETA for those who care and do not wish horrors on me for of course being evil by being influenced into believing a close older family member who had been married before, I had my first follow-up today. Gynae were both amazed I did this without a spinal block (lidocaine is notoriously useless in this region) and quickly repaired some stitches that were torn, scheduled again in 6 weeks, and also said they were stealing my descriptor of “my downstairs’ Chernobyl’s theme park” for future patients who needed a laugh.

This is literally the stupidest thing but it’s caused a huge issue so here we go. Also- sorry in advance I’m not a great writer:(

I have worked at the same office for 3 years and my coworker, let’s call her Roxy, has been with us for a few months less than me. About a month ago Roxy started trying to play country music on our Alexa more often.

Relevant backstory: I grew up with chronic migraines and spent a lot of time in the nurses office in middle and high school due to them. At both schools they played country music in the nurses office and refused to turn it off even when I my migraines would make light and noise extremely painful. As a result of this I can only listen to back to back country music for 3 hours before I start getting a headache.

Roxy is FULLY aware of this - I have mentioned in at least 3 times. It started with her playing it more often (we were in a 60’s music phase) which I would let play until it reached the point where it was going to give me a headache (~3 hours). Then I would change it to 60s since we all like it. After the change in music she started acting moody, getting angry and upset and it would carry through the rest of the day. This kept happening- I really tried to put up with it for as long as I could since she kept making such a stink but I honestly don’t want to be popping exedrine when I don’t actually need it to fight the headache.

Roxy kept getting moodier and moodier, treating me worse and insinuating that I do nothing at work (we just do different things). It came to a head when she changed it back to country 2 times and I snapped and told Alexa to play a radio station she doesn’t like and made a comment that “if she wants to be petty so can I”. I was just tired of this and wanted to make a point. I usually don’t play that station out of consideration since she doesn’t like it. I have told her multiple times she can play literally anything else.

My boss (Sue) stepped in and got Roxy to agree to letting Sue pick the music. It went ok until the end of that week- when Roxy changed it to country music and Sue switched it. Roxy got really mad and said she should at least get 1 day of her music. She keeps treating me like garbage because of it and refuses to communicate. I did some digging and found a station that plays classic rock mixed with country music so we could compromise without me getting a headache but unfortunately she just keeps making resentful comments about me. I’m seriously at a loss here and even when I try to put myself in her shoes it doesn’t make sense. My boss said something to me today that insinuated I was part of the problem but I genuinely haven’t done anything other than the one petty action to prove a point.

So AITA?

TLDR- my coworker insists on playing country music even though it gives me a headache so now my boss doesn’t let her play it anymore and she’s BIG MAD and I feel like I’m somehow in the wrong

EDIT: The music is for the lobby (we are at the front desk) so unfortunately headphones are not an option- sorry I forgot to include that!

EDIT 2: I am aware that my issue with country music is in my own head, it is an unfortunate association and if I could help it I would. You are absolutely allowed to not believe me tho- I’m pretty sure Roxy doesn’t either.

I haven’t touched the music since Sue stepped in other than once to play the hybrid station I mentioned. I let Roxy know that there was a sticky note with the name of the station. We are currently listening to what Sue wants- I only ever chose what they liked- I mostly listen to alt music and that’s not lobby friendly

Thank y’all so much for the ideas I can’t wait to bring them to Sue tmrw! I’m about to hop off now to research how to make Alexa play a specific made playlist Sue and Roxy can collab on.