r/BreastCancerSurvivors

The title is pretty much the post!! I feel angry, fatigued and just a flat effect all the time. I’m so mad at myself. I have no reason to feel any of these things. I have great friends, and my husband and kids and wonderful support. Why do I feel so lonely? I hate the AI’s. I almost felt better and more like myself during chemo than I do. Anyone else?! I’m already on an antidepressant. I can’t stand being around myself. Every task feels like it carries the weight of the world 😢 I miss happy, oblivious, 2024 pre-cancer me 🫩🥺

Hey all, I kno I should stop googling I start chemo soon and trying to get my low VITAMIN D up because read online said if you have low V-D you have more chemo side effects, anyone went into chemo low Vitamin D, and was able control symptoms with the meds given etc, I know regardless Chemo comes with side effects but I saw it’s worse when it’s so low’, any insight would be great to calm my anxious mind. Thank you.

Hi there! I’m a 19yo daughter trying to help my mother battle cancer.

My mother was just diagnosed with stage 2 breast cancer yesterday. She obviously still has some tests to do before actually treating for the cancer.

However, 3 months ago my family and I decided to move away from a country we have citizenship in. The health care there is free. Free chemo. Free consultation. Mostly free.

But the country we’re in right now (we have citizenship here too) is not free. Like at all.

Based on survivors advice do you think it’s too late to head back home?. (Travel time takes around 2 days max)

Or should we stay here for treatment asap?

I'm the eldest in my family 19yo and my mother was just diagnosed with cancer. This means it's most likely my sisters and I have the gene. However, this isn't about me at the moment.

I'm so scared for my mother. I cannot imagine life without her. And she's the only person I know personally who has been diagnosed with breast cancer. Since I don't have anyone to talk to about this I figured it'll be a great idea to hop onto this subreddit.

I'm wishing her and all the strong ladies with cancer a speedy recovery.❤️‍🩹

Hi, i would like to hear someone who did surgery of breast with triple positive breast cancer with liver mets. I am in situation where i have good response after 11 taxols and 4 phesgo, almost 80 percent of mets are not visible on ultrasound, that was state before 4 weeks, next week i have ct scan, lump is not palpable, my markers drop from 580 to 55, is it posible in theory to come to all clean liver and breast operation, is here anybody who had that situation because my doctor said that chance for operation is small.....

Hi, I’m a 49(F) halfway thru my chemo in Canada, and wondering if anyone ever asked their doctor if they could take a break from the biweekly chemo routine for a few months? If so, did you decide to and what was the pro/con of your choice?

I started Paclitaxel end of April (treatment #5 of 8) and my body hates it. I had the acute response that required the center to stop treatment, flush my system, pump me full of steroids and then start over slower. I was a physical wreck after and the next began and an avalanche of new terrible symptoms. Day 2-9 intense full body joint ache, fatigue, blue moons at the base of three fingers, intensely itchy palms for days, then surprise two old injury sites flared up on opposite sides of my body. My oncologist and team know all about it, I communicate everything and try new routines, over the counter and Rx meds - it seems every day is a new terrible discovery of what my body can’t do.

The Oncologist decided to delay my next treatment for a week to help me recover, I was grateful. Despite being “young” for cancer (as the team likes to tell me) my body was getting worn out. During treatment #3 I started developing a greater sensitivity to the IV and bloodwork needles (the last infusion took three tries).

When the clinic called with my next treatment appt I suddenly started crying, and kept crying all day. I feel like I’ve lost my life to chemo. My partner (is amazing) and I have a small business, I have not been able to do my front desk work there for months. We can’t afford staff. June-Oct is our peak season and we’ve just entered our third year with a business award and grant. It’s been so hard to put that on ice and my partner has never made me feel bad about that, but I miss it. I miss waking up with energy, I miss participating with the world. Most cycles I’ve not been strong enough to even take myself on errands.

I’ve reached out to my Oncologist to discuss pausing. I think it would be a relief physically and emotionally, and would invigorate me to participate with our community this season.

Has anyone ever done that?

I had my lumpectomy in late Dec 2025. My tumor was “slow growing” and despite finding signs of cancer cells in 2/3 of the removed lymph nodes all full body scans and imaging showed no metastatic spread. I’m also hormone responsive, so they plan to do radiation and hormone suppression therapy (5yrs) after chemo. I apologize for not knowing all my technical terms, it’s written down I just am too worn out to check.

I stressed Canada because I’m under the impression the US healthcare approach is much more a la carte than the commonwealth healthcare systems.

I (42F) have recently been diagnosed with Invasive ductal cancer, measuring around 2.5cm with no obvious lymph node involvement so far but i read you can only tell during surgery. (ER+/PR+) and HER2-negative, Ki-67 of 30% My doctors recommended a single mastectomy, with chemotherapy and hormone therapy being considered to reduce the risk of recurrence.

Im am scared. I havent been sleeping. I cry all the time. I have a 5 year old and i need more life. I want to see him grow up. This has been a shock. I never smoked, dont drink etc etc I feel so helpless. Im the only carer to my child. I struggled with infertility and had my baby through ivf. I was so happy before this.

I dont know how to cope anymore. I guess i just needed to write this down.

Has anybody had breast radiation with implants in place? How did that go for you? What were the long-term effects.

Last year I was diagnosed with breast cancer. A primary tumor of 22 mm and four affected lymph nodes.
I underwent the standard treatments: 16 rounds of chemotherapy, an amputation (mastectomy), radiotherapy, and 10 years of anastrozole. After the surgery, it turned out that the chemotherapy hadn’t worked well. And now I’m terrified…
I would really like to hear stories from women who lived a long time after similar diagnoses.

Will be having a mastectomy in a couple of weeks and I need to make a decision about what types of reconstruction I want. Can I just have the mastectomy and then go private in a couple of years and get implants done? Can that be done? Or is it best to get it done when having the mastectomy? The thought of having an 8 hour surgery scares me (they said it could take that long as they need to remove fat from my belly or back) and even then I’m not even sure I’ll be eligible as I don’t really have much fat in my belly area. Pls help with any experiences you have. I don’t think I’m ready to go flat yet. I’m so torn and so worried. Thank you 🩷

So yesterday I experienced a deeply powerful emotion. I drove 3.5 hours to Houston to help my 80‑year‑old mother get to a series of radiology appointments, including a standard mammogram and breast ultrasound. When we entered the breast imaging center’s main lobby, a small woman with dark hair in her late 30s or early 40s popped up and helped me with the door as I struggled to control my mom’s transport wheelchair while also keeping the door open. I thanked her, we smiled and nodded, and then took our seats to wait.

Eventually it was my mom’s turn, so we headed back to another waiting room — a more private one, decorated with tons of pink and breast‑cancer‑support everything. You know the type: the highly decorated bras, the wishing tree where you can write notes for yourself or others going through breast cancer. At some point we were brought into the imaging room with the mammogram machine. From there it was a cycle of me helping my mom answer questions from the techs, getting her set up, stepping out while they took images, and then waiting while they ran them to the radiologist. The radiologist kept requesting additional images, so I was bouncing back and forth between the imaging room and the lobby.

During one of these back‑and‑forth moments, I found myself in that little private waiting room again — this time with the woman who had helped me with the door. We were on diagonal sides of the seating area but facing each other. She was wearing the same type of gown I had helped my mother into, so I figured she must be in the middle of her own imaging.

A radiology nurse brought her a warm blanket, and she wrapped herself in it. The nurse spoke to her in Spanish, but the one phrase I caught — repeated more than once — was “mass grande.” I watched this kind woman fight back tears as the nurse walked away. Then she pulled the blanket over her face and folded into herself, shaking with quiet sobs.

I didn’t know where she was in her journey or what exactly was happening, but I knew that whatever the nurse had said had struck terror in her. And I remembered. I remembered all of it — the feeling of the floor dropping out from under me, the blood draining from my face, the mental chaos of competing voices shouting so loudly that I couldn’t hear any of them clearly, only the panic.

She was alone. Technically, we were alone together in this little pink waiting room. Without thinking, fueled entirely by compassion, I got up and went to her. I sat next to her and put my hand on her back while she stayed tucked under the blanket. She kept sobbing and shaking, but it felt right that she didn’t have to face that moment completely alone.

Eventually a different nurse came to get her. She noticed the woman was in distress and handed her a box of tissues. Then she looked at me and asked, “Are you with her?” I said no, probably with a concerned but confused expression. I guess it was a little awkward — me touching a complete stranger who was crying in the lobby.

We helped the woman stand, and as the nurse guided her toward the next room, she finally looked at me. Her eyes were full of fear. I opened my arms to offer a hug, and she stepped into it. I wrapped my arms around her, and we shared a gentle but firm squeeze. Then — out of instinct or habit or maybe just mom energy — I kissed the top of her head. She was much shorter than me, so it just happened. Looking back, I’m glad she didn’t freak out. It was quick, but it was genuine.

I wanted to tell her I was six years out from my breast cancer diagnosis and doing fine. I wanted to tell her that maybe what they found wasn’t cancer at all, and that she was in the right place to get answers. I wanted to replace her fear with hope. But that wasn’t the moment, and my Spanish wasn’t strong enough to say any of that with the tenderness the situation deserved.

We dropped the embrace with a quick nod and half‑smile, and then she went into the next room. I went back to bouncing between my mom’s imaging room and the lobby, wondering if I’d see her again. I didn’t. She left while I was with my mom.

Later, that nurse found me and thanked me for my kindness. I told her I was a six‑year breast cancer survivor, so maybe her fear just hit me a little deeper.

I’d like to think it was meant to be — her and me in that little pink waiting room, alone, when she had something big and terrifying to face. She had shown me kindness earlier when I needed a little help, and I hope I was able to return it when she needed comfort.

Who knows.

So here is my question. What is this thing inside me — inside so many of us on the other side of breast cancer — that makes us want to help the ones coming behind us? What do we do with this calling?

​

Recently diagnosed. ~3cm mass currently only in the right breast 7 o'clock almost adherent to skin. Nothing looks wrong in the left breast. No family history.

Invasive Carcinoma of No Special Type (Ductal) - Grade 2. ER+ PR+ HER2- ki67 20-25%

Delhi, India. Age 33. 7months Postpartum with ivf conceived twins. Size E (DD) breast.

Surgery needs to be planned in the coming week. The options given by our doctor are:

1. Breast conserving surgery (using LD flap): I'm not keen because it will be followed by radiation.

2. Single Mastectomy

3. Mastectomy with reconstruction (diep flap/silicon implants)

I am leaning towards double mastectomy instead of options 2 & 3 for below reasons

1. Removing only 1 with no reconstruction (left remaining intact) will be very odd.

2. Reconstruction is another hassle with a long recovery period.

3. With my twins to take care of, I want to choose the option that has least amount of downtime. Even if I can't hold them, atlst I'll be able to move around to help my family take care of them.

4. Financial aspect is another reason I am not inclined towards the reconstruction part. The high cost is not something very feasible at this point.

5. Maybe sometime in the future when things are better, 5 years or so, might think if all things are good.

Please help me with your experiences. I am taking 2nd opinions from other doctors but definitely looking forward to opinion of this group.

Thankyou

I had my exchange surgery March 23.
So I’m almost two months out. I have very little body fat so couldn’t do Diep flap. However, the plastic surgeon I had did liposuction on the insides of my thighs (which didn’t have much fat) and a little on the hips. My thighs were excruciatingly painful for a month. And blackened with bruises.. I was unaware of how severe this would be. But the biggest disappointment right now is the implants have ripples in them. The placement is nice and symmetry, but the fat that was harvested from my legs, and put around the breast implants to fill in, etc, must have dissolved or spread out because all of the fullness has dissipated and the ripples in the implants are just all too present. Is this just something most women have to expect who don’t have much body fat that have this surgery?
I’m not sure if I’m setting my expectations too high or?

Laura

Did 16 rounds of chemo and just had my DMX Monday. Got my pathology report and I’m kinda spiraling a bit. Can anyone in my situation or similar explain what comes next?

ER strongly positive (81–90%)
HER2 negative
PR negative
Ki-67 ~30% (moderate-to-fast growth)
Cancer in lymph nodes (3 out of 6 nodes)
Small residual tumor in breast (pT1c)
RCB-II (moderate amount of cancer left after chemo)

Had double mastectomy in September 2025. After a weekend of gardening, pulling weeds and a Pilates class, my under arm has gotten very puffy and swollen. Hurts to touch

I went to plastic surgeon today for a regular check up, and he told me to go to my oncologist surgeon to check the lump out. Has anyone experienced this before?

When I was making that appointment, the nurse said “I’m not stressed, but I understand why you’re stressed.” I am very stressed. If this had happened to anyone before please let me know what the end results were/things you did to bring the puffy/swollenness down