u/woah2026

Me (M29) and my wife (F30) have been together for about 4 years now and when we started dating she did warn me about her anxiety and depression before we got any deeper into the relationship and I agreed to stay. For 3 1/2 years I've seen her struggle with her anxiety but it was manageable. Now that we are married the last 4 months she's been in a bad depressive episode and I am the only one that is seeing it all. She refuses to let anyone else know. This episode of depression is hard and I am coming to the realization that I have given up a life that I imagined. I will have to go to family/friend functions by myself, cook, clean, take care of the pets by myself.  Due to how much I have to take care of her I no longer want kids, because that would add to the Chaos. I’ve been the strong one trying to hold it together and trying to convince her to go to therapy, but at what point do I give up. She is finally seeing her pcp to see if she can get new meds, but I am now terrified that I made the wrong choice to stick with her. I love her with all my heart (both our families get along and are like 1 big family), but it has only been 4 months of this episode and going a whole lifetime like this I can’t think too far in the future anymore, because of all the uncertainty. I am at a loss of how long I should try to make this work and how long I can sustain being the strong one in the relationship.