Is FOMO actually the true reason some people decide to have children?
I’ve noticed quite a few friends and people on social media who used to say they didn’t want kids, but later changed their minds and had them. When asked why, they often say they now feel more financially stable or emotionally mature enough for it.
That made me wonder whether becoming “ready” genuinely changes how people feel about parenthood—or whether part of the motivation is FOMO, social pressure, or not wanting to miss out on a major life experience as more people around them start families.
I’m asking partly because I’m questioning my own motives. I’m 36, and I’ve never had a strong maternal feeling or a clear moment where I knew I wanted children. For most of my life, it just never felt like something I deeply wanted.
But now that more people around me are having kids, and I’m feeling increasing pressure from family and society, I find myself wondering if I’m starting to want children because I truly want to be a parent—or because I’m afraid of missing out, being different, or ending up with a life that others see as less meaningful.
Has anyone else wrestled with this? How did you figure out whether your desire for children was genuine versus driven by outside pressure, FOMO, or fear of regret?
Curious to hear honest perspectives.