Feelings that resemble a familiar state of consciousness from very early childhood whilst on psychedelics
I've been studying the phenomina of perceiving thoughts and conscious states that resonates with how things were in early childhood. It feels like a return to early cognition. It's almost a primordial feeling. Pre-structured. Perhaps before concepts fully formed.
I've experienced this across Salvia Divinorum, LSD and Psilocybin. I've even felt it with THC (Cannabis) at times.
The strongest marker is a sudden internal recognition. A clear sense of "I remember this". Not a memory of a specific event. But a memory and feeling of how perception itself used to feel. Probably before I even developed language.
Examples:
- A space in my mind that feels familiar (not a physical space from real life). Like a mental point of view. These can almost feel like rooms, or places my mind goes to that I had forgotten.
- Garbled childlike words being attached to thoughts and things I see.
- Seeing people differently. Faces look more lean and raw rather than fuller, Seeing them as a type of person rather than an individual.
- Flashes of early visual memory. Mainly from my first computer. (ZX Spectrum) It had a particular style of graphics. Have also seen flashes of other things I had as a very young child, like a toy calculator.
- The feeling of everything being at a different mode depending on what is going on. LIke the sound of a bird cooing outside has now become very prominent, like everything and everyone exists under it.. When it stops, the entire state resets. The mode can change based on someones feelings towards me.
These states feel deeply familiar. States that I had forgotten I once had.
During these, I dont feel like I've regressed or become a child. I'm still fully aware that I'm an adult. These come through as brief glimpses of how my mind felt or how I perceived things when I was younger.
I'm also not saying that this is how my mind / consciousness was when I was a very young child. It just feels like thats how it was.
Anyone else had anything similar? Like a pre-structured state? Or anyone share any further perceptions or ideas of what this actually is? Is this memory recall, or access to a baseline mode of consciousness? Is it a side effect of being less physically connected as we potentially were when we were very young? Hence stirring up the old memories?