u/sir-cheebis

i've been on testosterone for four months. today i made the mistake of telling my mother about how her constant questioning of my choice to transition has made me obsessively doubt myself for the past year-ish, and how i chose to transition anyway because i thought it was best for me. she started crying and begging me to stop testosterone, saying that i should listen to my thoughts (that i'm pretty sure are intrusive, considering the voice that wants me to detransition sounds very similar to the voice that wants me to believe women are inherently inferior to men). still, i don't know which side of my head to believe, and it scares me to no end that she might be right. i wish i didn't live in a head that was constantly trying to sabotage me. it's like i'm playing obsessive whack-a-mole, i get one obsessive tendency under control and another one pops up to replace it. i don't know what to do, i'm sorry if this post makes no sense