I need someone else to tell me if i’m okay for this
i don’t even have shame anymore because i need to get off my chest and actually talk to someone.
this. is the third time this theme has come back and it’s complicated. being afraid i crossed a boundary whilst masturbating. it’s something i developed when i was young bc i don’t watch porn and especially now bc i’m in a relationship but this is eating at me. i was casually scroll things like instragm or tiktok or even youtube whilst masturbating. i guess it was just to have some sort of stimulus in front of my eyes. i’m not seeking people out and the video have never been sexual bc if they were i would’ve scrolled and ive defiantly never searched for people. now I’m at a point where I feel terrified if there was a person in those videos that I thought was attractive, but I have no memory of doing so, but I do feel honestly a little shame for this habit I developed even though my boyfriend has absolutely no issue with it. Can someone please talk with me?