u/purp_rapbeat

14 step skincare routine.

Zero regrets.

My pores are immaculate.

We grow and supply fresh mangosteen out of South India. Harvested and packed same day, green sepals intact at dispatch.

Currently supplying premium hotels and retailers domestically. Looking to open conversations with serious international buyers in UAE, Singapore, and EU markets.

Direct buyers only. DM if interested.

Suddenly he’s missing for hours 😈

This actually happened and he was like ...Leja beta aur yeh 12-step routine bhi saath leja. 🙏

Left her crying for long hours 🥺

The relationship didn't last. The 6-step routine did.

Tonight, I took my revenge.

My wife said, “Don’t touch that, it’s expensive.”

That should’ve been the end of it.

But ever since she said that, that bottle has been sitting on the bathroom shelf looking at me funny.

And I haven’t forgotten the day I paid for it.

At checkout, she picked it up like it was milk.

I looked at the price.

Looked at her.

Looked at the price again.

For a second I thought this better come with monthly returns.

She got home, washed her face, used two drops, and went to bed like nothing happened.

Nothing.

No glowing halo. No background music. No dramatic reveal.

Just sleep.

Meanwhile I’ve been walking past that bottle for four days thinking, there is no way this little guy won.

Tonight she went out.

The bathroom was quiet.

Too quiet.

I walked in like I was settling an old score.

Picked up the bottle. Read the label. Still didn’t understand a single word. Applied two drops anyway.

At first, nothing.

Then I caught my reflection.

And I froze.

Why do I look like I pay taxes on time?

Why does my skin look calmer than my entire life?

I stood there for a full five minutes.

Just me.

The mirror.

And a level of softness I was not emotionally prepared for.

So yeah.

Tonight, I took my revenge.

And unfortunately… my wife may have been right.

Psychedelic Forest Gathering on 2nd May near Nashik.

DM for more info.

Only hardcore and experienced psy fans DM.

Entries are full. I can only take 2 more people with me.

Newbies are not allowed.

I asked him “What’s in your bag?” like a normal person.

He looked around first.

Like I just asked for his bank OTP.

Then he unzips it slowly…

and I’m not even joking, it looked like a travel-size skincare showroom.

Cleanser.

Another cleanser (apparently for “different situations”?? bro what situations??)

Moisturizer.

Sunscreen.

A teal bottle that looked like it files taxes and judges people.

Everything neatly arranged.

Like he has a system. A routine. A purpose in life.

Meanwhile my skincare routine is:

wash face

stare at myself

hope for character development

Obviously I start roasting him.

“Bro you moisturize mid-day also?? Is there a schedule?? Do you set alarms??”

He just goes, dead serious:

“yeah, 2pm.”

I thought he was joking.

He was not joking.

Then I actually looked at his skin.

No acne.

No random bumps.

No “this came out of nowhere” situations.

Just… calm. Stable. Like his life is together.

My skin?

Breaks out if I drink less water.

Breaks out if I drink more water.

Breaks out if I THINK about improving.

Now I’m sitting there re-evaluating every life decision since 2012.

Anyway… I didn’t say anything after that.

Just nodded like I understand skincare now.

I don’t.

Be honest:

Are you

A) water + vibes

B) carry your bathroom everywhere

C) pretending you don’t care while your skin is fighting demons

No lying. I can tell.

Maximum violence.

Beach day. Sun’s out.

Confidence high. Poor decisions loading.

I’m sitting there, fully convinced I’m built differently.

“No sunscreen needed” type energy.

She looks at me… pauses…

and reaches for SPF 50+ like this isn’t a discussion.

I laugh it off.

She does not.

Next 30 seconds 🤔

I’m getting sunscreen applied like I’m in kindergarten.

Forehead. Cheeks. Nose.

Even the “don’t forget this area” treatment.

I’m annoyed. Slightly embarrassed. People are watching.

Fast forward 2–3 hours:

My friends = red, peeling, reconsidering life

Me = chilling. Skin is somehow still normal. No burning. No regret.

Now I’m confused.

Because:

I didn’t ask for this

I didn’t believe in this

But it clearly… did something

I came here to tan.

Instead, I got a free lesson in not being an idiot.

Question is -

do I start using SPF daily like a responsible person…??

or pretend this never happened and risk becoming a tomato again?

Let me set the scene.

It's midnight. My wife is asleep. The house is dead quiet. And I'm in the bathroom doing the one thing that makes me feel like I have my life together. My skincare routine.

Red light device strapped to my face. Peptide serum still wet on my skin. Staring into the mirror like I'm trying to solve the meaning of life one pore at a time.

Then I hear it.

My window. Opening.

I freeze.

Footsteps. Someone climbing in.

Now here's the thing. I didn't panic. I didn't run. I didn't grab anything. I just slowly turned around.

Picture what he saw.

A grown man. In the dark. Red light glowing off his face. Completely still. Staring directly at him like he was expected.

The guy stopped mid climb.

We locked eyes for what felt like three full years.

He backed out. Closed the window. Left.

I stood there for a second, nodded to myself, and went back to my routine.

Skin's been incredible lately.

😊😊😊

What's the weirdest place or time your skincare routine has saved you? Drop it below. I genuinely need to know I'm not alone.

She left for a week.

Her side of the bathroom looked like a lab.

I wasn’t planning anything. Just picked up one bottle out of curiosity.

Label said “hydrating.” Seemed harmless.

That’s how it starts.

Next day I used it again. Then I noticed there were… categories.

Cleanser. Serum. Something called exfoliating that sounded slightly dangerous.

Somewhere around day 3, I stopped guessing and started following the order.

By day 4, I had a routine. Not proud of it, just… happened.

Here’s the problem ... it works. 😐

Like actually works. Skin’s clearer, not oily by 11 am, no random dryness.

Even my face looks less tired, which I didn’t know was fixable.

Now she’s back in two days and I don’t know how to act normal around that shelf.

Do I ??

A) Pretend I didn’t touch anything

B) Ask what each product does and expose myself

C) Quietly build my own routine and never speak of this again

Also… if anyone has a beginner setup that doesn’t look like a chemistry kit, I’m listening.