u/polkadotgirl08

I (17F) and my best friend (17F) had been friends since our freshman year of highschool. We both struggled with mental health and anxiety so we clung to each other quickly. I loved her so much and never thought we'd fall off. Until she met her now boyfriend. She had been crushing on him since late freshman year and then got the courage to text him sophomore year. Things were going smoothly until she found out he was texting other girls. She ghosted him, I comforted her, she moved on. Little did i know this would be a repeating cycle. They started talking again late junior year and dating summer 2025. I was happy for her and thought "maybe hes changed" oh i was SO wrong. This man is the definition of egocentric. He believes he can do no wrong and pushes the agenda that she must "obey and respect" him. He gets mad at her for having male teachers if that puts into perspective. Ive tried getting her away from him for a year now but she keeps running back. They've broken up 7 different times and ive comforted her with 7 different get well baskets. However recently i am just over it. I lashed out and told her "at this point you like getting cheated on and yelled it, cant you see he doesn't love you?". I know this was harsh but i truly tried to support her all i could. Shes even giving up her dreams of becoming a doctor at SDSU because he wont let her leave our city. I just cant be friends with someone with no backbone... but i miss her. She constantly defends his actions and gets mad at me for pointing out how unhappy she is with him. I understand its not as easy as leaving, but she deserves so much more and im not the only friend shes lost. Am i being a bad friend?

2 weeks ago, my mom bought me a new car (Honda CRV) and i loved it, my anxiety was being handled, my acne was clearing, i felt happy for the first time since october 2025. However, my friend who is a freshman in highschool while i am a senior asked me to hangout and i reluctantly said sure. I had a ton of homework to do and i was honestly tired but i already struggle to keep friends so i thought sure fine. Everything was fine until she asked to drive my car. I trusted her since she told me she had her permit and had driven before. I should have known to not trust her when she got the gas and break pedal confused. However i was stupid and continued to let her drive. She reversed back into a parker vehicle and then apologizes profusely as if that will fix it. I wish she had just told me that she never driven before instead of lying so I could blindly trust her. Im embarrassed and ashamed and don't know how to stop self loathing. She lied about having her permit and blocked me on social media after the accident. Now, my parents took away the car and i have to take the bus as a senior until i graduate (may 25) and i feel like my home life is ruined. I am honestly just getting by day by day knowing this isnt forever , but it hurts. Any advice from people with similar experiences? 😞