u/pinkpolkadotunicorn

I feel disgusting and so disappointed in myself rn. I’m waiting for my door dasher for the third time today… I was able to go bp free for about four days and now for the past 3 days I haven’t been able to stop. I’ve probably spent about $100 today on food and canceled my Pilates class this morning just so I could binge. I was doing so good and now it all is just going downhill and I feel like I’m spiraling like crazy. I don’t think in the past 2 years of having mia I’ve reached 4 binges in a day. I would always cut myself off at 3 and now I hit 4. I hope I’ll be able to take a break again and eventually quit. I feel so hopeless.

My lack of self control is astonishing. The amount of times I’ve deleted DoorDash just to download it again😭💔 at least I don’t have dash pass anymore…

I’ve been b/p free for 3 days which i am crazy proud of myself for. I haven’t binged nor purged at all and today i literally ate a salad for lunch, some fruits for a snack and when i got home from work pork chop and bell peppers for dinner. I don’t think i overate at all but for some reason i genuinely feel like yaking it all up right now. It’s been hard to breathe for th past hour because of how full I feel and I don’t know what to do. I feel so fucking uncomfortable and it’s really triggering. Is this normal after stopping b/p? I keep burping and it feels like I’m going to throw up when I burp. Its hard for me to take full breaths as well, it feels like it goes halfway through (idk how to explain)