u/pineconewashington

It was supposed to be my second-last law school exam ever. I'm a 3L. I'd already deferred the exam and today was the day that I was supposed to...give it...and. the one brain cell that was left alive decided that it's a good idea to take a tiny nap before I get ready. I set multiple alarms for 7:30 AM. I woke up at 1:00 PM. I ran towards the university with 50 pages of carefully written notes and outlines in my hand. And they said I couldn't take the exam 5 hours after I was supposed to take it. Which is understandable.

I missed my exam. Not because anyone died or because I was sick. I missed it because I'm a massive idiot. Does anyone know how to deal with being a massive idiot?

We've been friends for a year. We both have CPTSD, share the same politics, etc. I am also autistic. We're locked into a lease together. I want to stay friends but the more I have gotten to know her the more I realize that there's something really...wrong about the way she perceives things and what she expects of me at times. For e.g.:

• I've told her about my fear of being perceived and how, while of course we'd socialize with one another when we're living together, as her roommate I'd also need some space to just...be. Anytime I've mentioned something related to space or privacy, she took it as an attack or made it into an argument about how she doesn't want a roommate who doesn't acknowledge her existence or something. Which isn't even what I was saying, but she's been making me feel bad for trying to set up ground rules like if I'm on my computer desk I wouldn't like you to talk to me unless it's an emergency or something.
• We were both looped into a bad contract with a real estate agent. We were both mad at her. I was venting my frustrations to her and told her that once the contract ends and she's no longer got the noose around our neck, I*'*d like to confront her about duping us. And she started saying how she didn't like that, and seemed very hurt for some reason and said "you should consider how that impacts me" and I was like, how would it impact you after the contract ends? you won't be affected in any material way if I confront her; I was also harmed. And she kept pushing on how I should consider her, and I told her that "so you're asking me to put your needs before mine, even though I'm not doing anything to hurt you in a material way?" And she changed her tune to say "I just don't think it would be very effective." The real answer was she is afraid of confrontation (not that I'd asked her to participate), and the mere idea of it made her uncomfortable, so she thought I should do whatever she feels most comfortable with I guess.

There's lots of other examples. She always seems to want to centre her own feelings and while there's many good things about her too, she constantly expects that I'd regulate her. That I'd calm her down, make sure that she's okay, etc. And it drives me nuts. When I'm with her, I have realized that I often feel like the only way I can keep this friendship is by endlessly validating her. I feel like I have to walk on eggshells around her. As I said, we're stuck in a lease. So far I've been pretty insistent on my boundaries and have tried to minimize emotionally draining conversations, I try not to play the role of her saviour, but she expects it nonetheless. Do I:

1. Attempt to have honest conversations about this so that we can have a shot at a real friendship?

2. Just go for a more polite but distant type of a role until the end of the lease?

3. Something else?

Would appreciate your thoughts.