u/luvfolklore

Second post here today but I’m in a terrible mood today😭

I’m a retail worker, and there is nothing I hate more than customers who expect retail workers to possess some kind of omnipotent power and knowledge of the store and what we have.

First of all, the back that you always ask us to check? It isn’t a mirrored version of the shop floor. It’s a maze of rollers, pallets, and boxes that need sorted through. With the exception of things being separated by alcohol, clothes, and fresh produce or whatever, there is never a specific order or way the delivery is left. It’s just random. So no, even if we do have your ultra specific item in the back, I guarantee you I will not be able to find it by just ‘quickly checking the back’.

Second, not every employee has the same training. I’m a worker at our small sushi counter! I am a food assistance staff, so I do not get till training, and I’m rarely on the shop floor doing stock, so I don’t know where things are as well as other employees would. Yet every single day, when I go to self checkouts to scan what I have picked for lunch, some customer is always having till trouble and asks me for help. I politely explain that I don’t have till training, but I will get someone for them, and so many of them question this? They’re like ‘Why? Is it that hard? Just help me. It won’t take long!’. Like, it will take a while actually, considering I don’t have training nor an ID number to access the settings of the till to resolve the issue.

Or, a customer will see me in my apron, sushi counter uniform (which is different), and my hat, and ask me where some really random item is. And sometimes I know, like with general items like eggs, but sometimes they ask for a specific flavour and brand of an item and I’m clueless. So again, I say ‘Sorry, I’m not a shop floor worker so I’m not too sure! But I can definitely go find someone who will know if you can give me a sec!’ and on multiple occasions I have been asked ‘Don’t you work here? Isn’t it your job to help me?’. Like yeah. It’s my job to help if you want fucking sushi.

Overall, PLEASE understand that not all retail workers get the same training. The shop floor layout can change depending on new items or a store refit. Our stock checking app doesn’t always work. Give us some grace. We literally just work here, we don’t know every little detail about the store.

I’m a woman, twenty years old, and I’m an intersectional feminist. I criticise the patriarchy, I understand it affects both men and women.

And I hate talking with male centred women. Like women who have to bring their boyfriend to every single occasion, even if we barely know him and it’s a girl’s night. Women who only ever talk about their boyfriend. Women who make a night out about finding a man when the rest of us just want ti dance and have fun. General shit like that, I HATE it!!

But I ALSO hate women who make hating men a personality trait too. Such as when you have a minor disagreement with your boyfriend, and you sort it out easily, but your man hating friend will still say ‘men ain’t shit!!! cheat on him!! fuck him!!’. Women who, anytime a man is mentioned, just begins these insulting tirades because anytime a man is brought up, she just can’t help herself. This is ALSO a form of being male centred.

Whether you’re a woman who is too obsessed with male attention and constantly tries to get it, or a woman who can’t go three seconds without shitting all over an innocent guy, men seem to live in you head rent free.

Please, let us go 10 minutes without talking about men.

i’m not sure if this is the right kind of subreddit for this post, so please redirect me if there is a better one for it.

i'm 20f. i've been dating my boyfriend since we were 17 and 16. he used to like me a lot. i know he did. he could never stop gushing about how pretty i was. he was so expressive and kind. he put effort into gifts. we would both plan fun and interesting dates and have a blast. he would just seem so unabashedly excited to see me, and he was proud to be with me.

for the past year, it's changed a lot. but it's gotten worse these last few months. every thing is last minute, as in gifts and plans. i don't like starting conversations about things i care about because he doesn't seem to find my interesting anymore. and it he i do, he changes the topic half way through to something he cares about. but there's so much more i want to say to him. i would tell him about seeing a leaf fall from a tree if it meant i could speak to him just a little.

he's still kind and polite, and he calls me pretty every once in a while, and he says i love you back when i say it first. but that's just it. it's always me doing everything first now. he treats me like an acquaintance. i miss the boy who loved me so much, because right now, i keep blaming myself and i’m convinced it’s something i have done. in reality, i know it isn’t and that i can’t control his feelings. it isn’t his fault he’s stopped liking me. i just wish that wasn’t the case.

he sleeps in to late and decides he isn't coming over, but he has no problem going out weekly with his friends and committing to those plans. multiple times i've suggested a dinner, it still hasn't happened. i have planned most dinners we have gone to in the past, so just this once, i'd like the be the one taken out. i guess i want that as some kind of proof he still likes me.

i can't say anything bad about him, not really. he is sweet and kind, and he hasn't done anything truly terrible. honestly, i think he just doesn't like me and doesn't know how to tell me. because he continues to try in some ways, but it just seems half-hearted. like a chore. and that hurts me more than if he were just to stop all together. he’s the kind of person who feels such immense guilt when he has to do something that could potentially hurt people’s feelings, and i’m 99% sure that’s why he hasn’t broken up with me yet. because, neither of us have done any wrong. it’s simply just him losing feelings.

stupidly, i've been wondering if it's because he doesn't find me pretty anymore. my acne came back. and i have kind of a round-ish face. my teeth at a little bit yellow, and i have really thin lips. I'm skinny, but i don't have much of a chest or bottom, either. my hair is long but it isn't sleek or shiny no matter what i do. and my skin is so pale that any blemish is immediately highlighted. he used to make me feel like i was the prettiest girl in the world, but now i'm wondering if he sees nothing but all of these flaws now.

he’s been working a little of over time recently, and he’s absolutely slammed with classes. so part of me wants to believe when we get our summer break he’ll go back to being attentive and loving. but i can’t see it happening. but i also love him so much. i don’t want to be without him, but i also miss feeling pretty and loved too.

i know this probably can’t be fixed, so i'm not looking for life changing advice. mainly, i just wanted to get this off my chest. i just love him a lot, and i wish it could have been different. although, i suppose i would like to know if there is anyway this can be fixed? am i giving up to easily? thank you for reading.

tl;dr i know my boyfriend doesn’t like me anymore.

cross posted onto here from r/relationships because it got removed by mods for not following guidelines, and i added some info :)