u/kayval1516

Hi all - 40/F.

Here I am. Turned 40 in January. Asking these questions. Who would have thought.

I have frozen eggs over multiple rounds over the age s 38/39. I have 23 eggs. My stats were good for my age but after an initial disaster first round of 2 eggs due to uneven follicle growth, my other rounds were down regulated long protocol to have more control. I had decent numbers collected but a 60% maturity rate each time. Can’t double trigger on long protocol so with my clinic we chose to stick with long so get the numbers up using control rather than risk uneven growth with double trigger. So I ended up with 23. Annoyingly my final round - they couldn’t access my left ovary which had most of the good follicles, had they been able to - I’d be sitting with more like 30.

Anyway. I found last year so draining. Mentally. Physically. I was a shell of a person. Doing this alone is so tough and no one quite ‘gets it’. Even my friends who have had ivf - they had their partners so don’t quite understand the isolation of it.

However - I can’t shake off - should I do one more round and use a donor to make embryos? Just dig deep mentally and do it? I paid cash for all my treatment so far which has easily been approx £16,000. However this would have to be with a loan/ credit card.

I asked this on the single moth by choice group - they’re brutal there. Telling me essentially the frozen eggs won’t work. Blah blah. Essentially what I’d done so far wasn’t enough for them to feel ‘satisfied’.

Anyone made donor embryos? Or just faced with this?

Hi all, first time poster!

A little backstory. I froze eggs at 38/39 and I have 23 frozen. I kind of don’t want to use them and see them as my absolute reserve.

I am now 40. Still single. sigh. I am considering digging deep and doing one more round and using donor sperm to see if I can create embryos so I’m covering all bases.

Do I do one more round of just freezing? or an embryo round? or just draw the line and say - I’ve done my best already and leave it there and fingers crossed something comes of my 23 eggs one day.

Im not quite ready to do the full single mum by choice immediately yet but its looking that way within next year or so.

Id love to hear your experiences, your opinions.

Im UK based and self funding. Spent around £16k so far cash but would need a little loan to do this extra round if I do it so funds aren’t infinite and this would deffo be last one.

I do feel a little sad, I just can’t believe this is my life at 40 :-(

Hi all,

For context. 40/UK based

Last year was intense. I completed 3 rounds of egg freezing, using down regulation. I have 23 eggs frozen. Total cost at around £15k.

I don’t know whether to do one more and use a sperm donor to make embryos? I’m scared to use the frozen ones in case they don’t work and then I’ll be too old to try to do a retrieval and donor at that point in time. I also kind of what to keep them as an absolute reserve, in case I can’t have any naturally and I (somehow) meet a lovely man and we want to try for children.

Some people don’t understand this and think why waste money on ANOTHER round and just use the frozen ones to see what embryos I get.

Im also thinking do I really have it in me to do another round mentally. like when is enough enough? I’ve tried my best so far and I should be proud of that? Like when do you draw the line.

I don’t really have the money to do another around with a donor, probs be around another £7.5k. So I’d need a loan for that, but perhaps it’s my only chance?

Urgh. I dunno. Not sure what my amh is either. It was 19 (UK measurements) just over a year ago.

anyone else faced with these thoughts? or people giving their opinions all the time? I’m just so deflated that I’m 40 having to face this.