u/itzlax

I'm 21, to be 22 in October, and live in Portugal. For most of my life I was very care-free, not in the sense that I didn't have anything to care about, but in the sense that I never got very nervous or anxious about much.

On my last year of high-school's internship, it's like a switch flipped and suddenly I began to get anxious at everything, to the point where I needed to quit my internship because I physically could not get out of bed in the morning. The next year I was able to sign up to finish my internship, which I finished only because I had the option to do it online since it was around the peak of Covid.

I got better over time, and began job hunting, which unfortunately took a fairly long time. I got a first job, where the anxiety began again. I was there for a month, and in the last couple days I'd need to excuse myself to the bathroom to get myself to relax at least two or three times a day. Health issues started again, a second attempt at medication, to no avail.

Monday of this week I managed to get an interview for another job, and around 8 hours ago I got the call back that I was accepted. The anxiety and worries never quite subsided, but now they're flaring up again, even worse. A million thoughts in my head, my heart is beating like it's going to blow out of my chest, can't even get words out of my mouth.

So, what can I do for my future? I want, and need to, work, but something about a 'regular' job gives me this uncontrollable anxiety. I've done tests, talked to a psychiatrist, been given medication, but nothing really resolves it. I keep trying, but there's some sort of mental block messing with me, and I feel time going past faster and faster and I keep doing nothing with my life.

I'm not depressed, I'm a fairly happy person. My family isn't rich and definitely needs my help more, especially monetarily, as time passes. I need to make money, I need to work, but something isn't right, and I need some sort of resolution to this.

What can I do? I need advice as much as I also need to vent my frustration out.

Tenho 20 anos, terminei o 12° com 18, infelizmente fiquei bastante tempo à procura de emprego, mas finalmente fui aceite numa loja de informática não muito longe de onde vivo. Ordenado mínimo, nada absurdo, mas trabalho é trabalho.

Mas acontece que o treinamento para este meu primeiro emprego, que vai durar 4 semanas, é longe. Cerca de 2 horas de ida, e 2 horas de volta de transportes públicos, ficando lá 8 horas + 1 de almoço.

Recebi a notícia há 2 dias atrás, começo na segunda-feira, e desde então estou com a cabeça a mil, um aperto no coração, e não consigo parar de pensar nisto. Uma ansiedade que nunca senti antes, não necessariamente pelo trabalho, mas pelo trajeto até lá; 4 horas do dia dedicadas só a chegar ao trabalho, sem contar com o tempo a trabalhar, e o tempo a preparar as coisas.

Sei que há muita gente que vive isto há anos e vai continuar a viver. Tenho a sorte de ser só o treinamento, mas não sei exatamente como lidar e precisava de desabafar.

Se alguém por acaso tiver algumas coisa a dizer que acham que me podem ajudar, fico feliz em 'ouvir'.