I know we don’t like AA here. But im genuinely wondering how many of you all WERE in AA, left, and now drink?
Are most people in this sub sober?
Are most struggling to GET sober again?
How many of us believe we can never drink again?
What is the demographic in here, just out of curiosity.
I’m just done with it. I don’t care anymore about writing inventory or going to meetings or calling my sponsor.
All my friends are like “we’re worried about you, we’ve never seen you like this.”
Well, yeah - I finally realized spending every fucking day hating myself for not connecting with God wasn’t getting me anywhere. Id stay up until 11:30pm talking to my sponsor about nonsense, and never saw any progress.
I am also terrified that I’m gonna drink. I think it’s so ingrained in me that this is the start of a relapse - but it doesn’t make me want to go back into the program deeper again. At this point, I think I see the bullshit too much that I don’t even think I can.
I just don’t believe in it. I’ve spent 3.5 years in AA. If God is real, I don’t like him - I want nothing to do with him actually. So if that’s the case wtf am I doing in AA?
But I don’t want to drink and die either. And yes I feel closer to a drink than I have in the last 3.5 - which also makes me feel like I’m just fucked all around.
Anyone leave after this amount of time and stay sober?