I can't take it anymore
I just wanted to be like anyone.
I'm not someone special in any way.. I don't know what I like or what I want to do. I don't have anyone to rely on.
I got raped because I was so alone that I didn't have anyone to call, to ask for their opinions.
My parents doesn't love me, and if they do, it isn't the kind of love they gave to my siblings. They cared for each of my siblings, not me. They spend time with my siblings for theirs birthdays. But never mine because "we can't celebrate your birthday, we don't have money. Maybe next month we will." But it never came.
The few people I have, I'm afraid they gonna leave me. I'm scared that my boyfriend end up breaking with me because I'm annoying.
He tells me that I'm the most beautiful thing in the world but for how long.. Everything has an end.. I hurted him so much time because I can easily get upset, I don't even know why.. I hate doing this to him..
I know that he would be better off with someone not like me.. not always depressed.. But I can't bring myself to even leave him because I love him too much.. Much more than I love myself..
I just want to be normal but that's impossible.. Perhaps it's would be better if I disappeared from this world..