u/curious_cucumber1998

Hello, I am new here. I (28F) was actually diagnosed with CPTSD by the first therapist I ever saw, at age 23. My boyfriend at the time convinced me I didn’t have it and that therapy was confusing me and pathologizing my already perfectly healed inner self. There was a lot of weaponization of spirituality in that relationship. I stopped therapy, disregarded the diagnosis, and forgot about it for years.

Now I’m coming full circle. I’m pretty sure I do have CPTSD. I’ve been diving deep into childhood trauma for the last couple years and the work I’m doing now is incredibly, shockingly destabilizing. Im at a loss. I had no idea healing would look this ugly.

I am in the process of moving to a different state, so I will be finding a new therapist (thank god, my last one was useless), and psychiatrist. In the meantime, I would love to hear any tips for what kind of support to ask for from my partner when I’m having an episode or emotional flashback or whatever is happening to me (I’m not well versed in CPTSD symptoms or the terminology yet). I would also be grateful for book recommendations, especially for women, and anything that helped you cope with the early stages of navigating the diagnosis, or what you wish you knew/did differently to make the process more gentle. Thank you 🙏🏼