Cutting
I wanna cut myself again. I've been doing it on and off since I was 12, I'm 24 now. It makes me angry that I can't just do it without everyone looking at me differently or worrying about me. I'm sitting in bed, annoyed, because I want to go sit in a nice hot shower and slice myself up a bit but my fiance will find out tomorrow. It'll hurt him, he'll be worried, I'll feel bad, I'll have to go over it in therapy and it'll just be a whole thing. It definitely doesn't sound like it but I've been making a lot of progress on myself and mental health lately though it's been a rough few weeks and I'm just craving the release. Why is it so much worse than any other bad vices like drinking or nicotine? I'm not trying to kill myself, I know my limits and I always properly clean and bandage myself. I have a blade in my wallet, why shouldn't I?