Does the urge ever go away?
I think about it when I’m breaking down about it when I’m having a good day, I think about it when I’m high, I think about it when Im drunk. I feel fucking ridiculous. Is it like PTSD where they tell you that the flashbacks never stop you just get used to it? I haven’t cut, but my habits are resurfacing in different ways. I’m fighting to the point of bruising. I’ve even broken skin lightly or I slam my fist to my hands go numb. And all I can think about is how fucking stupid I look. It’s embarrassing to do and it’s even more embarrassing having to share that with my partner. Idek what the fuck I’m looking for posting this. Can’t really talk to a friend because the last time I tried to seek support from friends, the whole group abandoned me and said that I was trying to manipulate them. So now I don’t not wanna share anything with anyone you’ve been with some of my long-term friends said they’d always be here for me. I’m always the common denominator.