Hurt people hurt people, but dad wasn’t hurt.
My father hit my mom.
My dad hit his children who were assigned female at birth.
My father is extremely emotional abusive.
My father was also 23, and my mom was 15 when they got involved.
My father has never been sexually abused.
His parents had a healthy marriage, and a reasonable divorce.
His father never yelled at his mother.
His father never cheated.
His father never beat his mother.
His siblings never beat, molested, or bullied him.
He grew up well above the poverty level.
Lots of opportunities.
No early deaths.
No childhood bullying.
No intimate partner based violence early on.
None of it.
The idea “ hurt people hurt people” doesn’t apply here.
The idea my dad must have been made into a monster makes me irrationally angry. Even my therapists have searched for a reason that makes sense to them.
The reason that they are looking for is that he chose to be. There’s nothing more.
My dad was born, and was abusive from the start. Nothing more.