u/anhedoniasucksass

So I know how to tuck however almost every guide I ever seen requires shaving beforehand. I want to tuck but I don't want to have to shave. Whenever I shave every single hair becomes ingrown and hurts so bad the entire week that I have trouble walking. I want to tuck more than once in a while but it takes at least 2 months or so to get rid of all the ingrown hair.

So is there anything I can do either tucking without shaving or a way to not get ingrown hair when I do shave?

So now that my whole family is supportive I've been thinking about coming out at work. Not right now though as I still wanna get used to being gendered correctly around the house. However I do want to eventually come out at work as the people there are amazing. I know most everyone will at least still be friendly as I've gotten compliments on my hair before. I've already come out to one guy as he's a work friend. However there is one guy I'm concerned about.

He's like 60 and been working in the industry for years. Everyone there loves him and he is the backbone of the area. However he's sexist and possibly transphobic. I used to be chill with him he'd crack jokes and I would either laugh or make a half assed joke back. However about 3 months ago things changed.

He started saying stuff about my hair and that I should cut it if I want to look nice for church. That had hurt as at the time my hair was the only thing I loved about my appearance. He tried to joke about it more but I got mad enough that he stopped. Things went back to normal after about a week though I wasn't as happy about the jokes as I usually was.

Then about a month ago I was hanging around talking with the guy while waiting for my carpool buddy. I was half complaining about how he does things whenever he needs to cover me. Then he says something that hurt me more than anything had in years.

"You whine almost as bad as a woman".

I probably went red in the face with how mad I was and stormed out forgetting to clock out. I nearly punched him in the face and I kinda wish I did. For context I have PTSD from anyone using whine or whining in that way.

For most my life even into my teenage years my parents would use me whining as an excuse to not listen to me no matter what the issue and even got my siblings in on it. So anyone saying "stop whining" or anything similar makes me feel like a scared hurt child again. That on top of being incredibly sexist while also invalidating my existence even if he didn't know.

I could probably count the number of words I've said to him since. So while I absolutely love most my coworkers and my boss would likely have my back I don't want a single comment from him even if he gets in trouble for it. So my question is this: what do I do because I love this job even if it doesn't pay very much.