u/ababbca

I’m 25M, and my ex and I broke up about 8 months ago after being together for 3 years. The first couple of years were honestly amazing. I really thought she was the one. Even though it was long distance, we made real effort meeting often, staying connected, doing everything we could.

But in the last year, things started falling apart. We had differences, kept going on and off, and couldn’t find stability. The love was still there, but it just wasn’t working.

I suggested taking proper space like no contact to figure things out individually. But we never stuck to it. We’d end up talking again, patch things temporarily, and then break again. It became a cycle. Eventually, we ended it for good. After the breakup, she didn’t take it well. She got into heavy drinking and went through a depressive phase. I couldn’t be there in person because of work, and I still feel guilty about that. I really wanted her never to go into that bad habits.

Later, we met and got some closure. But then about a month later, I found out she was already seeing someone else. She literally kissed him on their first meet while being drunk.They started dating. That completely broke me. I couldn’t understand how it could happen so fast.

She used to tell me it would be impossible for her to even kiss someone else. Let alone having a thoughts of dating would be impossible. That those things mattered deeply to her. How can these words said from the heart are so HOLLOW. It didn’t even lasted for a month. Within 4–5 months, she was already physical with the guy.

That’s the part I can’t get out of my head. It makes me question everything was what we had even real?

What confuses me even more is that when I spoke to her 2 months ago, she said she hasn’t moved on. But her actions don’t match that at all. When I told her it seemed like she had moved on, she got upset and said I was taking her feelings for granted.

I just feel stuck with all these thoughts.

Has anyone else experienced something like this? How did you deal with it?