[Complete] [9,600] [Fantasy] Winter Beast
Hi everyone,
This is a linear story arc for a game I'm making, but for now it's a standalone side story since I haven't written the main story yet. Though our game won't be told linearly or in a way using a lot of text, I wanted to convey the type of feeling I had thinking of it as a proof of concept.
So, inspired by many, many, many web novels, I wrote this! I never written before, but I can say I have a vivid imagination and a really strong foundation and everything kind of just fell together.
The foundation was a creation myth I would base our entire worlds off of. I'll show it here but note that the creation myth is for the main story, but there are some hints within the side story. There are some endings too of our game but I don't think I want to expose too much. Anyways, if you're interested, please PM me and I can provide a word doc or google doc.
What I'm looking for:
- Was the pacing okay?
- Which moments were the most engaging?
- Which moments were the least engaging?
- Did you grow attach to any of the characters?
- Which pieces of symbolism were most obvious/interesting to find.
Creation Myth:
Before existence, there was Nothing and nothing. Nothing could not exist beside nothing, for to be Nothing, there must be something. Nothing wished to be nothing, and nothing wished to remain nothing.
Thus, Nothing’s desire gave birth to the first flame of existence, by which it would immolate its brother.
Consumed by the flame, nothing burned with desire. In its incessant hunger, nothing’s wishes were devoured; nothing wished to scream, yet had no mouth; nothing wished to live, yet could not be; nothing wished to die, yet could have no end.
Instead, the flame roared—thus were the Roars of Creation.
Instead, the flame persisted—thus were the Embers of Life.
Instead, the flame waned—thus were the Ashes of Death.
Knowing it could not exist with existence, Nothing became Corruption: A flame unto itself, that would erase all that ever was.
Defiled by Nothing, the flame could not divide, for its warmth was all encompassing; thus, it shattered itself upon the glass of reality that once reflected its light.
Yet that which was left corrupted remained aflame, Nothing sought to extinguish it, yet the flame too fed on Nothing. So was born a cycle of life and death, endlessly repeated as time. The flame named itself Desire, for only it was left eternal, and it longed for its shards to reunite to become whole once more.