Sexually Assaulted in public and mum blaming me?
Assalamualaikum I'm 17F, I was SA'd during Ramadan, I wont go into detail, of what exactly happened, I was going to taraweeh its a 5 min walk from my house to the mosque and i was late my mum already left before me and my siblings and dad so i was the last one out, on the way there it was dark and it was like a quite one way road , I was in a rush so was speed walking and there was like a middle aged man walking towards me everything just happend so fast i was stood in shock, he just touched me innapropriatly and it felt disgusting and just walked past like nothing happend, i stood there for a good few seconds in shock then i started swearing at him and he was like I didnt do anything I went up to him and kicked him in his balls I just did everything in impulse and stupidity i mean he could easily overpower me because he was so big , and the one way road is attached tothe main road so the way he was walking was towards the main road and i started hitting him because i was so angry and disgusted and crying out of anger an people gathered around they knew what happend but i dont know what happened after that as i went back to taraweeh because I was already very late and my mum would start shouting at me so after taraweeh finished i told my mum what happend, and I was shocked at her reply i went and told her because i trusted her and she's also a woman and my mum but she started saying it's my fault, and the reason she gave was she said I am already really attractive to people and look physically attractive and on top of that she said i Act like an attention seeker, just because my personality im very extroverted and dont really care what other peopke think about me and i laugh out loud alot in public and talk loud anf etc.. it's not something i do on purpose that's just how i am, she said that it's my fault even though i was alone at that time and wasn't doing anything like that i wear proper hijab with an undercap and cover all my hair and was wearing a loose abaya nor do i even look at anyone in public or try to grab attention as she said as I have no interest in that, but she keeps giving me dirty looks as if im doing it on purpose and i was crying so much but she didn't do anything to comfort me I didn't tell my dad only my mum knew i couldn't sleep the whole night not because i was SA'd but shocked at how my mum treated me, I know im physically attractive at a certain age people do start realising how they look to other people and thats why I covered myself properly and never done anything to start grabbing attention, i went college last year and my mum made me drop out because she said she didn't trust me they keep me caged at home im not even allowed to go anywhere and only can go out with my family not friends not even to the shops downstairs, I know how to keep myself safe, yes I've done some things which i regret and repented for and she knows that, Im very close to my deen I try my best Im not perfect, but she always treats me like everything is my fault and im a like shameful woman or make me feel disgusted of myself sometimes and feel like it's my own fault even though it isn't, at this point I dont even know what to do , maybe she's right? is it my fault honestly? and should i change my personality? and are they right to keep me caged in the house like this? I didn't choose my looks, and it doesn't make sense she said that as even niqabis or people who arent considered physically attractive by majority also experience SA , Im starting to hate myself and how i Look and pray to Allah to make me ugly so atleast I can go outside and they can trust me, and have a bit of freedom i know parents should have some strict rules in place for their kids but there is a limit and they have Alhamdulillah tought me good things and atleast should trust me everyone makes mistakes and they did too so why do they act like im the worst person on earth and literally make me disgusted of myself sometimes, I dont even wear makeup only occasionally and when i do she starts saying who are you trying to impress and girls shouldn't be weaing makeup it attracts guys like wtf I barely wear it, Ive lostso muchweight because of the constant stress she has given me throughout my whole life, she is a very beautiful woman Alhamdulillah very pretty features much more beautiful than me, and ofcourse beautiful features attract, and I know she has been through alot too then why does she do this to me I feel like she hates me sometimes, i usedto be more beautiful but since i have lost weight my face and body are very skinny and i look like a child, and I'm kind of more happy because being beautiful isn't always good, even though i knew how to carry myself and my limits and had self respect, it was still uncomfortable at times even though i acted like I didnt care, wether your physically beautiful or not you have to facehardships with both so one is not better than the other, I'm sorry if this is really long!!! I just have a habit of explaining the most simple thing in detail, I really need help on this matter and I'm very confused on what to do and who's right and if Im being too sensitive?