u/TipWild5706

I (36F) just saw my ex (35F) on Hinge after only being broken up for 12 days. I know, I know, well I was on Hinge too. It's not the Hinge part that upset me, it's the fact that all of her prompts were perfect for me. The way that she described what she's looking for and what partnership means to her are all things that she couldn't give me in our relationship. She said she's looking for a life partner. Throughout our 3 year relationship she told me she couldn't give me more time. Plus, her pictures were all ones I took of her, which I know happens. But it was still a gut punch.

I felt so sad and jealous when I saw her profile. I felt my heart drop. If I didn't know her and just came across this profile I'd be psyched to swipe right. Based on her profile we seem so aligned in what we are looking for, our interests, and sense of humor. But in real life that's not true.

It doesn't help that we've been in constant communication since breaking up. We talk on the phone every night for hours. We both seem to be in the stage of not wanting to let go, but also wanting to see what else is out there. I feel so embarrassed and ashamed to be going through a break up at this age when all of my friends are married.

I need some reminders that just because someone writes that they want a life partner in their Hinge profile doesn't actually mean that they are going to put in the work to be one themselves.

I (36F) was recently broken up with by my partner of 3 years (35F). Our relationship started while she was in law school. Because of that we struggled to spend time together. We entered into a bad cycle of me feeling like I couldn't talk to her about things that were challenging for me about our relationship because she was always stressed out from school. I held my needs back for years because I would be told "no" 85% of the time when I would ask for things.

Fast forward to earlier this year when she told me she wanted me to be more emotionally open with her so that we can deepen our relationship. I've been trying and I thought our relationship was back on track, so I was surprised when she broke up with me a few weeks ago.

Since the breakup she's been telling me she's confused and unsure of her decision. I told her if she wanted to explore what we need to be together I am open to that. She keeps telling me that I was a great girlfriend and deserve better than her; that I shouldn't be in love with her potential. I am struggling with her feeling like she can't give me more. I love her. I don't want to be broken up. I want her to be the kind of girlfriend she was in her past relationships.

I'm not looking for advice. I'm just sad.