u/TahiniInMyVeins

I’m not even here to vent cause I’m not that angry, weirdly. I’m just… zen about it.

I have been in discussion with a late stage startup since February. From the get go I didn’t like the hiring manager. He gave me Cold Pricklies. But the rest of the team was Warm Fuzzies and the job was interesting. It would have been a lateral move for me on paper (important: I am already employed, thankfully) but it would have been closer to what I want to be doing.

Anyway, after 80 days and 8 rounds (included two panels) I got a verbal offer. Their ceiling was my floor, which I knew going in. What I didn’t know was their bonus package was flat capped (instead of percentage based) and the equity was a math riddle. I expressed surprise at the bonus and started asking questions about the equity. Equity is WHY you join a start up — you are taking a risk on a little guy, you’re making an investment in them, with hopes there’s some kind of pay off. It was late stage so i knew I wasn’t in for life changing money but it was still an important part of the comp package in my book.

Hiring manager put me in touch with the CFO who walked me through the equity and confirmed what I suspected when I first got the offer, which was the equity was super low. Low enough that at this point, looking at the total comp, I would actually lose money if I took the job. Not a lot of money, just 5K, but still. I’d been in an 80 day slugfest for a lateral move that was going to cost me 5K a year.

I decided to use the weak equity and nonstandard bonus to try and renogotiate the rest of the package. I’d indicated I was ok with the base before but I hadn’t signed anything and now that I had new information, I figured it couldn’t hurt to ask. My note was calm, polite, doubled down on how excited I was for the opportunity, and that I was eager to find a common ground. What’s the worst that could happen, right? They say no?

The worst that could happen is they pull the offer.

Maybe I asked for too much — I certainly didn’t expect them to give me what I was asking for; I included huge blinking red signs indicating I was ready to compromise/meet them halfway. Maybe I shouldn’t have asked about severance — I’d never tried to negotiate severance up front before and never will again lol.

In any case, I’m feeling weirdly zen about it. A couple months ago a dream job slipped through my fingers and it fucked me up for about two weeks. But this… I was ok with it. I sent the hiring manager a classy note five minutes later saying it was a shame the math didn’t work out and wishing them luck.

Like I said, not venting. Just felt like I needed to put it in writing and release it into the universe. I don’t want to scare people away from negotiating and if I didn’t already have a descent job (a job I am done with and eager to leave from, but pays the bills) I certainly would have done things differently.

I guess I’m curious if people are seeing a trend out there w/ companies not willing to negotiate? But mostly just… wanted to write it out.

Good luck out there folks.