u/StuffWooden288

I avoid all men in public and when i meet one i cant make eye contact or smile. I will wait in longer lines to avoid male cashiers and have walked out of a doctors office when its a male nurse taking in the patients. Only men i can relax around are gay or have girlfriends, otherwise 9/10 times im introduced to one i fall for him so hard that i cant talk without blushing or flubbing words. It amkes things so fucking awkward because i cannot hang out in friend groups with males else i get attached to them to an obsessive extent. I fantasize about them and then feel disgusted with myself like i am a pervert raping them by being attracted to them. Repressing my desires makes me go insane, i live alone and i have to drink and smoke to make the nights bearsble. if one i liked ever did try to flirt with me i would probably vomit and run and hide. No sexual trauma just ugly and weird

"just talk about your feelings" only works when you are NORMAL. Don't tell people you have never been in a relationship and are afraid of men they will see you as a little baby and pity you until the end of time