How do I tell my bf that I’m okay with things going further?
So for context, me (17F) and my bf (16M) have been together for nearly 8 months. This is both our first long term relationship, and it’s also the first relationship were we both have kissed people, we had our first kiss with each other. I really like him, and he really likes me too. I don’t doubt he likes me. At the start of the relationship he didn’t like, initiate any touch? Like no hugs, no hand holding and no kissing. He only started to do that after I’ve done it first, I’ve also told him that if i wasn’t okay with anything I would tell him and expect him to do the same.
Ever since we reached a stage where we got over the shy part of just kissing, things have been going very good. We make out and give hickeys, but that’s it really. Even the making out part took kinda a long time for us to get comfortable, we only started doing that around month 4. I know every relationship is different and it’s perfectly fine that we take things slow.
I think I was also expecting him to jump at any change to kiss or touch, seeing as he is a teenage boy. But before I gave the green light, which btw was me literally telling him ‘you know ur allowed to kiss me right? I’m ur gf, u don’t even have to ask, please kiss me’ he wasn’t pushing for anything. Once again I know this is good. But I couldn’t mind him touching, he hadn’t even grabbed a boob (but that might be my fault, once we were cuddling, he pushed my top to scratch my back and once I got off him my top didn’t fall down so I flashed him my whole chest. I didn’t react the best, as I face planted my bed cuddling my blanket just saying ‘noooo’ and ‘what did u see? Was it bad?’ My poor bf just tried to comfort me by saying he didn’t see, ofc he saw, he said that my boobs don’t look bad and that they look ‘healthy, u don’t seem to have cancer.’ After that whole flash incident one of my friends informed my bf that I cried about it, I did kinda clarify with my bf that I cried later on out of embarrassment.) So yeah, his hands have not been anywhere near my boobs, but he does on occasion grab my bum.
He also just turned 16, which is the age of consent. But I’ve been thinking of taking things further even before he turned 16, I haven’t told him this tho. He also does have a stash of condoms which his mom bought, but they were bought at the start of the relationship as a joke. His mom and my mom both ask us sex questions, so it became habit for me and my bf to joke about the sex conversations. We have started joking about ‘straight teeth’ which Ik sounds painful, but it’s just a joke but I think it’s important because before we started being comfortable giving each other hickeys we joked about hickeys. I also went out and bought condoms, I didn’t tell him this and the condoms are hidden in my room, I bought them months ago just in case.
I’ve also not indicated anything more than kissing, my hands have not touched any part of him in a sexual way before.
The point is, I’m too shy to ask my bf about sex. And I don’t think I’m ready for full sex, I don’t think I’ll be comfortable with him seeing me fully naked and I don’t like the way my kitty looks (girls with outies will understand). I know my bf isn’t going to judge me, but I’m not on the skinner side, he doesn’t seem to mind as his played with my tummy fat and even given me tummy messages to tickle me. I’ll be comfortable with sucking him off, how do I bring this up to him when we only laugh about sex and that sort of stuff? Also I’ve felt him be hard around me before, and never bought this up so I’m pretty sure he does have some sort of want?