u/Salty-Big-3747

I try so hard to avoid existing every year on this day. (26 F) I have struggled so hard to pick up the pieces after my mom died. I had to clean her apartment all by myself, make her funeral arrangements, take in her cats. I want to LOSE it. It’s been 3 years and I still feel underwater. I have 3$ to my name until my next paycheck so I can’t even do anything for myself to try to make today easier. Can anyone tell me when it gets easier ??? Pls