For several years now, I’ve been wondering if the problem comes from me, because I can no longer seem to stay in a job for very long. In the span of three years, I’ve gone through five different jobs.
In my first job, I stayed there for two years. The atmosphere was very toxic, and nobody stayed long because of one particular manager. He constantly looked down on employees, antagonized everyone, and was verbally aggressive. One day, we had an altercation because I refused to let him speak to me disrespectfully. The situation escalated, he tried to hit me, and I defended myself. I was fired, but I filed a complaint and won compensation. The company had to pay me damages.
After that, I found another job despite the owner’s bad reputation. While working there, I heard him make disgusting comments toward a female employee. For example, after she forgot to check something, he told her: “Do you also check condoms when you get fucked?” I found that behavior extremely inappropriate, and I made it clear that I did not approve of it. After about a month, I also realized he wasn’t paying me for my overtime hours. When I complained about it, he fired me. I then sent him a letter with all my evidence, including my records and Google logs showing my working hours. In the end, he paid what he owed me.
Later, I joined another company where I had been told I would be paid hourly. Once I started, I discovered they had actually placed me on a fixed salary arrangement, meaning my overtime hours would not be paid. This had never been agreed upon beforehand. I raised the issue, and tensions quickly developed with management. The company refused to hire more staff even though we clearly needed additional employees, and I was expected to constantly stay several extra hours every day. I did not think it was acceptable to regularly work more than ten hours a day. I told them that I intended to quit, but they fired me before I could leave.
Then came another job where I had problems with my manager. After only two weeks, I found her behavior strange. Every time a problem happened in the company, she would immediately accuse me without even asking whether I was responsible. Each time, I had to explain why it could not possibly have been me. Sometimes, I was not even present when the incidents she blamed me for happened. After several conversations, she would systematically realize she was wrong, but despite that, she kept accusing me every time an issue appeared. Eventually, I lost patience. Things no longer worked between us, I told her what I thought, and I was ultimately fired.
Today, in my new job, I am trying to be as polite and respectful as possible. After going through several difficult experiences in only a few years, I am genuinely trying to pay attention to the way I react and communicate, and to be helpful because I did not want to lose this job.
However, I recently made another post about a situation at work. I tried to help my coworkers with a task, and it ended up backfiring on me. I got blamed for it, and now I feel like they want to get rid of me because of that situation where I disagreed with them.
I think I may have a problem, because I cannot keep quiet when I feel something is wrong or unfair. It is now costing me my jobs, and I feel like I may have to accept that even if I am right, I should say nothing.
My question is: am I really the problem, or have I simply been very unlucky with the jobs I’ve found?